Номера 2
Описание
Тираннис открывает одну из улиц, которая будет превращена в величественный бульвар, подобный тому, что он видел в Коринфе. Ступендус пришлось завершить набег на её имущество, так как она должна была установить арку. Это приводит к тому, что Тираннис и Ступендус находят себе новых вторых помощников. Ступендус находит себе второго помощника в лице воительницы Зан, но удивляется, когда Тираннис выбирает себе в помощники человека по имени Вормиус, который планирует помочь Тираннису улучшить Крапополис. Вормиусу удаётся улучшить Крапополис, построив величественный бульвар и наняв телохранителей, а заявления Ступендус о том, что Вормиус предал Тиранниса, начинают подтверждаться, поскольку Ступендус обнаруживает, что Зан хочет быть похожей на неё. Тем временем Гиппокамп и Дафна отправляются на свидание в гостиницу «Кипрская бухта». К удивлению Гиппокампа, Шлуб и Делирия заселились в гостиницу «Кипрская бухта», а Дафна узнала, что Гиппокамп в прошлом не смог с ними договориться, и её попытка заступиться за него привела к тому, что Делирия превратила Дафну в червя.
Субтитры
- 00:00:02,605 --> 00:00:04,309 Tyrannis: Ladies and gentlemen, thank you
- 00:00:04,409 --> 00:00:06,313 for coming to this grand unveiling.
- 00:00:06,413 --> 00:00:07,882 Miriam: What's grand about it?
- 00:00:07,982 --> 00:00:09,351 Joshua: I don't see a veil.
- 00:00:09,452 --> 00:00:10,688 Tyrannis: Well, there was going to be
- 00:00:10,788 --> 00:00:12,057 an archway and a curtain,
- 00:00:12,157 --> 00:00:14,495 and my sister Stupendous was going to be here.
- 00:00:14,596 --> 00:00:16,533 A military presence would have really popped.
- 00:00:16,633 --> 00:00:19,138 Imagine I'm standing under a grand arch,
- 00:00:19,238 --> 00:00:22,177 and there's a full military guard and all this fanfare,
- 00:00:22,244 --> 00:00:25,417 and I'm pulling down a huge curtain to reveal...
- 00:00:26,821 --> 00:00:27,923 Miriam: Our street?
- 00:00:28,023 --> 00:00:29,092 Tyrannis: That's what it is currently,
- 00:00:29,158 --> 00:00:30,762 but it is the future home of
- 00:00:30,862 --> 00:00:33,266 Krapopolis' new Grand Boulevard.
- 00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:35,538 They have one in Corinth. It's fantastic.
- 00:00:35,672 --> 00:00:38,811 Joshua: What's a "boulevard"? Like a fancy cow?
- 00:00:38,878 --> 00:00:40,281 Brutus: Sounds like a real snob!
- 00:00:40,381 --> 00:00:42,852 Tyrannis: A boulevard is like a street, but bigger,
- 00:00:42,986 --> 00:00:44,088 with a garden down the center.
- 00:00:44,222 --> 00:00:45,224 I saw one in Corinth
- 00:00:45,324 --> 00:00:46,961 and it works like gangbusters.
- 00:00:47,061 --> 00:00:49,164 Kayleigh: What do we want with a big street?
- 00:00:49,298 --> 00:00:50,334 Tyrannis: We can have parades down it.
- 00:00:50,434 --> 00:00:51,837 We can march elephants down it.
- 00:00:51,937 --> 00:00:53,173 Joshua: Fancy elephants?
- 00:00:53,306 --> 00:00:54,609 Brutus: Oh, they think they're better than us?!
- 00:00:54,709 --> 00:00:56,145 Tyrannis: No one's saying anyone's better than
- 00:00:56,245 --> 00:00:57,516 anyone else! This is all going wrong!
- 00:00:57,616 --> 00:00:59,085 The announcement was supposed to be impressive.
- 00:00:59,185 --> 00:01:00,988 There was gonna be a big military guard
- 00:01:01,088 --> 00:01:02,257 in ceremonial uniforms.
- 00:01:02,357 --> 00:01:03,761 Where the hell is Stupe?
- 00:01:03,928 --> 00:01:05,196 Stupendous: Uhh!
- 00:01:05,263 --> 00:01:07,535 Gus: This was a great call! So fun!
- 00:01:07,669 --> 00:01:09,272 Stupendous: Right? I mean, every once in a while,
- 00:01:09,405 --> 00:01:12,311 you gotta pick a fight that's ridiculously easy.
- 00:01:12,411 --> 00:01:14,348 Enemy soldier: Why us? We didn't do anything!
- 00:01:14,482 --> 00:01:17,321 Stupendous: We're getting an easy win. What's it to you?
- 00:01:17,454 --> 00:01:19,660 Enemy soldier: Can you please just get it already,
- 00:01:19,793 --> 00:01:20,895 then, if it's so easy?
- 00:01:20,995 --> 00:01:22,464 You've been hurting us since morning!
- 00:01:22,599 --> 00:01:24,869 Stupendous: Aw, crap, is it not morning anymore?
- 00:01:24,970 --> 00:01:28,109 Everyone, wrap this up. We got a thing.
- 00:01:28,243 --> 00:01:30,314 I ran back here for a dumb announcement?
- 00:01:30,414 --> 00:01:33,019 That's why I've been training a drum corps?
- 00:01:33,152 --> 00:01:35,157 Tyrannis: You have something on your shoe.
- 00:01:35,257 --> 00:01:36,927 Stupendous: All right, everyone. Apparently,
- 00:01:37,094 --> 00:01:39,899 this wide street is important.
- 00:01:40,835 --> 00:01:42,505 Soldiers: Buh-buh-buh-buuuuh!
- 00:01:42,605 --> 00:01:44,475 Tyrannis: Guess you weren't able to get those trumpets.
- 00:01:44,576 --> 00:01:47,047 All right. Anyway, Scott, release the doves.
- 00:01:47,147 --> 00:01:49,887 Scott: I couldn't find any doves. I got badgers!
- 00:01:49,987 --> 00:01:52,324 [Citizens screaming]
- 00:01:55,965 --> 00:01:57,802 Stupendous: Ya did good, Scott.
- 00:01:57,902 --> 00:01:59,839 [Theme music playing]
- 00:01:59,940 --> 00:02:08,858 ♪
- 00:02:08,958 --> 00:02:09,959 Male singers: ♪ Huh ♪
- 00:02:10,060 --> 00:02:13,768 ♪
- 00:02:13,868 --> 00:02:16,173 ♪ Huh! Huh! ♪
- 00:02:16,273 --> 00:02:21,182 ♪ Huh! Huh! Huh! Whoo! ♪
- 00:02:22,886 --> 00:02:24,088 Tyrannis: That's what you were doing when you were
- 00:02:24,188 --> 00:02:25,124 supposed to be helping me?
- 00:02:25,257 --> 00:02:26,760 Just raiding an easy city?
- 00:02:26,860 --> 00:02:30,000 Stupendous: Yeah. It's called a vanity raid. It's for morale.
- 00:02:30,100 --> 00:02:31,537 Tyrannis: I needed you for a ceremony.
- 00:02:31,637 --> 00:02:33,741 Stupendous: Ty, look at me. I don't do ceremonies.
- 00:02:33,841 --> 00:02:36,212 I'm built for one thing and one thing only:
- 00:02:36,312 --> 00:02:37,616 ripping guys' heads off
- 00:02:37,716 --> 00:02:39,352 and shoving their head down their own throat!
- 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:42,224 Shlub: I've seen her do it. she's the best in the biz.
- 00:02:42,358 --> 00:02:43,728 Tyrannis: Well, the biz is changing.
- 00:02:43,861 --> 00:02:44,930 The biz is now ripping
- 00:02:45,030 --> 00:02:46,332 the head off civic duties
- 00:02:46,433 --> 00:02:47,803 and shoving the head down the throat
- 00:02:47,903 --> 00:02:49,071 of showing up for ceremonies.
- 00:02:49,205 --> 00:02:50,741 Stupendous: I gotta say, you made it sound
- 00:02:50,808 --> 00:02:51,944 as appealing as possible,
- 00:02:52,044 --> 00:02:53,379 but I'm just not cut out for it.
- 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:54,549 Tyrannis: You know what? You're right.
- 00:02:54,649 --> 00:02:56,185 I can't make you do that stuff.
- 00:02:56,285 --> 00:02:57,622 I guess this is how it ends.
- 00:02:57,722 --> 00:02:59,192 Stupendous: "Ends" meaning we fight
- 00:02:59,292 --> 00:03:00,862 to the death, or...
- 00:03:00,995 --> 00:03:02,197 Tyrannis: No, no, I'm saying
- 00:03:02,298 --> 00:03:03,634 we just can't work together anymore.
- 00:03:03,801 --> 00:03:06,372 I guess it's time for me to find a new Number Two.
- 00:03:06,507 --> 00:03:07,709 Hippocampus: I'm not available.
- 00:03:07,809 --> 00:03:09,311 Shlub: What is that rock you're rubbing?
- 00:03:09,411 --> 00:03:11,415 And is it magic? And either way, may I rub it?
- 00:03:11,516 --> 00:03:13,019 Hippocampus: It's for my girlfriend.
- 00:03:13,119 --> 00:03:14,489 Deliria: The little wood nymph? Branchy?
- 00:03:14,623 --> 00:03:16,058 Hippocampus: Daphne. Shlub: That's still happening?
- 00:03:16,125 --> 00:03:17,662 It's been so long since we heard anything,
- 00:03:17,762 --> 00:03:19,799 I'd rather assumed it had petered out.
- 00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:21,135 Hippocampus: Well, that's the problem.
- 00:03:21,269 --> 00:03:22,438 I've been so busy in the lab,
- 00:03:22,539 --> 00:03:24,075 I haven't been paying her enough attention.
- 00:03:24,175 --> 00:03:25,778 But I'm taking her to this place.
- 00:03:25,878 --> 00:03:27,548 The Cypress Grove Inn.
- 00:03:27,648 --> 00:03:30,622 Mineral baths, couples massages, moonlight dinners on the beach.
- 00:03:30,722 --> 00:03:33,393 Shlub: I have no idea why they call it the Cypress Grove Inn
- 00:03:33,493 --> 00:03:35,631 when clearly it should be named "Bone Town."
- 00:03:35,731 --> 00:03:37,167 Deliria: Oh, that's a much better name.
- 00:03:37,267 --> 00:03:38,971 I'd say Nymphy is a very lucky lady.
- 00:03:39,105 --> 00:03:41,409 Hippocampus: Daphne. Deliria: I'll call her what I want!
- 00:03:41,476 --> 00:03:42,946 Shlub: So you're giving her a polished rock?
- 00:03:43,046 --> 00:03:45,551 Well, that's about the least romantic thing ever.
- 00:03:45,652 --> 00:03:47,421 Stupendous: Typical science guy gift.
- 00:03:47,522 --> 00:03:49,593 Friggin' shiny rock.
- 00:03:49,726 --> 00:03:51,997 Hippocampus: Fine. I won't give her the rock!
- 00:03:54,001 --> 00:03:55,972 Kayleigh: Hey! Dumb rock!
- 00:03:56,072 --> 00:03:57,107 Tyrannis: Thank you all for coming.
- 00:03:57,207 --> 00:03:58,209 Once Scott has completed
- 00:03:58,309 --> 00:03:59,546 your medical evaluation,
- 00:03:59,646 --> 00:04:01,448 you can line up here for the interview phase.
- 00:04:01,583 --> 00:04:02,920 Scott: I will be examining your teeth,
- 00:04:02,986 --> 00:04:03,955 the shape of your head,
- 00:04:04,021 --> 00:04:05,257 and your stool sample.
- 00:04:05,390 --> 00:04:07,628 If you do not have a stool sample, make one.
- 00:04:07,695 --> 00:04:10,701 If you try to show me someone else's stool sample,
- 00:04:10,801 --> 00:04:12,037 I will know.
- 00:04:12,137 --> 00:04:13,541 If you tell me I'm just
- 00:04:13,608 --> 00:04:15,210 doing this for the stool samples,
- 00:04:15,310 --> 00:04:18,383 that's going to cost you another stool sample.
- 00:04:18,483 --> 00:04:20,187 Stupendous: Oh, good. It hasn't started yet.
- 00:04:20,287 --> 00:04:21,557 Tyrannis: What are you doing here?
- 00:04:21,657 --> 00:04:23,059 Stupendous: Ty, the leading cause of death
- 00:04:23,159 --> 00:04:24,362 among kings is the guy
- 00:04:24,428 --> 00:04:25,798 they hired to help out.
- 00:04:25,898 --> 00:04:26,867 This is too important
- 00:04:27,001 --> 00:04:28,337 for you to decide on your own.
- 00:04:28,437 --> 00:04:29,739 Tyrannis: Thanks for the vote of confidence.
- 00:04:29,873 --> 00:04:31,443 Stupendous: This is me caring about you.
- 00:04:31,544 --> 00:04:32,979 Tyrannis: Sounds like you not trusting me.
- 00:04:33,079 --> 00:04:34,182 Stupendous: Let me spin it
- 00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:36,319 how I want to spin it! Who's first?
- 00:04:36,452 --> 00:04:38,290 Long-haired warrior: It would be the honor of my life
- 00:04:38,390 --> 00:04:39,859 to protect the king!
- 00:04:39,959 --> 00:04:41,797 Stupendous: Dumb hair. Next.
- 00:04:42,632 --> 00:04:44,503 Satyr bellhop: Welcome to the Cypress Grove Inn.
- 00:04:44,636 --> 00:04:46,540 Are you folks here to save a relationship,
- 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:48,711 or are you just starting out? Hippocampus and Daphne: Save.
- 00:04:48,778 --> 00:04:50,347 Satyr bellhop: Oh. Well, you've come to the most
- 00:04:50,447 --> 00:04:51,883 romantic place on Earth.
- 00:04:51,983 --> 00:04:53,319 We always say, if you can't
- 00:04:53,419 --> 00:04:54,889 fix your relationship here,
- 00:04:54,989 --> 00:04:56,527 you got no business trying.
- 00:04:56,594 --> 00:04:57,929 Satyr server: Care for an aphrodisiac?
- 00:04:58,029 --> 00:04:59,465 Oysters? Chocolate? Ginseng?
- 00:04:59,532 --> 00:05:00,835 Plain old grain alcohol?
- 00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,905 Daphne: Don't even need it. Just show us to our room
- 00:05:03,005 --> 00:05:04,175 and I'll take it from there.
- 00:05:04,275 --> 00:05:05,611 Shlub: Son! Welcome to the party.
- 00:05:05,745 --> 00:05:07,381 We got the room next to yours.
- 00:05:07,481 --> 00:05:08,784 Daphne: You invited your parents?
- 00:05:08,884 --> 00:05:10,253 Hippocampus: I didn't invite them.
- 00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:11,489 Shlub: Um, when you get a chance,
- 00:05:11,624 --> 00:05:14,428 we've laid waste to all of your hot tubs.
- 00:05:15,430 --> 00:05:17,401 Tyrannis: Stupe, you can't keep overruling me.
- 00:05:17,502 --> 00:05:19,137 Stupendous: Guess what. You're overruled.
- 00:05:19,238 --> 00:05:20,273 I found you a guy.
- 00:05:20,373 --> 00:05:21,376 Tell him what you told me.
- 00:05:21,476 --> 00:05:22,912 Man: My name is Zan.
- 00:05:23,012 --> 00:05:24,214 Protecting kingdoms has been
- 00:05:24,314 --> 00:05:25,818 in my family lineage since before record.
- 00:05:25,918 --> 00:05:28,322 A blood oath to protect from a decorated warrior
- 00:05:28,456 --> 00:05:29,926 such as myself cannot be broken.
- 00:05:30,026 --> 00:05:32,599 No wound of flesh or mind would stop me
- 00:05:32,699 --> 00:05:34,168 from guarding Krapopolis.
- 00:05:34,302 --> 00:05:35,270 Stupendous: Ehh?
- 00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:37,207 Now, that's a candidate!
- 00:05:37,307 --> 00:05:38,744 Tyrannis: Pass. Stupendous: Are you serious?!
- 00:05:38,845 --> 00:05:39,879 Did you see him?!
- 00:05:40,013 --> 00:05:41,817 Tyrannis: I do, and I find him off-putting.
- 00:05:41,917 --> 00:05:42,985 He hasn't blinked yet.
- 00:05:43,152 --> 00:05:44,556 I saw a fly walk across his open eye.
- 00:05:44,656 --> 00:05:46,392 Stupendous: That's because he's looking for threats.
- 00:05:46,459 --> 00:05:47,662 Tyrannis: And he doesn't see the fly?
- 00:05:47,829 --> 00:05:49,164 Stupendous: The fly isn't a threat!
- 00:05:49,298 --> 00:05:51,236 This guy is everything you want.
- 00:05:51,336 --> 00:05:53,741 Hey, Zan, are you castrated? Zan: I can be.
- 00:05:53,841 --> 00:05:55,544 Stupendous: That's a team player right there.
- 00:05:55,678 --> 00:05:57,014 Tyrannis: He's everything you want, Stupe,
- 00:05:57,114 --> 00:05:59,485 but I'm the one who has to be around him, so...next.
- 00:05:59,620 --> 00:06:01,923 Zan: It was an honor to be considered. Thank you.
- 00:06:02,023 --> 00:06:03,159 Man: Hey! There he is!
- 00:06:03,293 --> 00:06:05,531 The man, the myth, the absolute legend.
- 00:06:05,631 --> 00:06:07,802 Heard about the opening, and I jumped at the opportunity
- 00:06:07,869 --> 00:06:09,506 to interface with you. Let's chat about what I could
- 00:06:09,606 --> 00:06:11,510 bring to the table, how we could level up your game.
- 00:06:11,610 --> 00:06:14,516 Stupendous: Sorry, weird bro. We're looking for a guard.
- 00:06:14,616 --> 00:06:15,685 Man: Ooh, are you, though?
- 00:06:15,785 --> 00:06:17,254 Or are you looking for someone
- 00:06:17,354 --> 00:06:18,490 in the business of guarding?
- 00:06:18,591 --> 00:06:19,826 Ty, my guy. You're the king.
- 00:06:19,926 --> 00:06:21,462 You gotta focus on that king stuff
- 00:06:21,563 --> 00:06:24,468 and leave everything else up to someone like me.
- 00:06:24,569 --> 00:06:26,807 And how do we do that? It's called "brainergy."
- 00:06:26,941 --> 00:06:29,646 Krapopolis is Vesuvius hot right now.
- 00:06:29,746 --> 00:06:32,250 People, business, culture. It could be the next Corinth.
- 00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:33,654 Tyrannis: That's what I've been saying!
- 00:06:33,787 --> 00:06:35,724 Man: Uh-huh! And you'd be calling the shots.
- 00:06:35,824 --> 00:06:37,093 I'm just the megaphone, big dog.
- 00:06:37,193 --> 00:06:38,831 Hey, you smell that? It's inspiration cooking.
- 00:06:38,931 --> 00:06:42,237 And buddy, you are a bread bowl of inspired. Ha!
- 00:06:42,337 --> 00:06:44,743 Tyrannis: Now, that's how you pitch. I like this guy.
- 00:06:44,876 --> 00:06:46,378 Stupendous: Are you friggin' crazy?
- 00:06:46,513 --> 00:06:47,749 He's obviously a backstabber.
- 00:06:47,849 --> 00:06:50,320 Do you not see that? The greasy hair,
- 00:06:50,454 --> 00:06:51,757 the constant rubbing of hands.
- 00:06:51,857 --> 00:06:54,461 This guy is textbook power weasel.
- 00:06:54,562 --> 00:06:55,765 Tyrannis: Yeah, my power weasel.
- 00:06:55,865 --> 00:06:57,636 Stupendous: Zan is the obvious choice!
- 00:06:57,736 --> 00:06:59,506 If you don't hire him, I will.
- 00:06:59,606 --> 00:07:00,675 Tyrannis: Be my guest.
- 00:07:00,775 --> 00:07:02,377 Stupendous: All right then! Zan?
- 00:07:02,512 --> 00:07:05,517 Oh! OK. Welcome aboard.
- 00:07:05,618 --> 00:07:08,289 Zan: I pledge my life to serve you.
- 00:07:08,389 --> 00:07:10,126 Tyrannis: Welcome aboard, um...
- 00:07:10,227 --> 00:07:11,495 Man: Uh, Wormius.
- 00:07:11,596 --> 00:07:14,636 And, bam, that's how you do it, Big Dog.
- 00:07:14,736 --> 00:07:16,472 Tyrannis: Could you call me "Big Dog" more often?
- 00:07:16,607 --> 00:07:17,775 Wormius: You got it, Big Dog.
- 00:07:17,909 --> 00:07:20,079 Tyrannis: Oh, yeah. I like that.
- 00:07:23,419 --> 00:07:25,123 Tyrannis: I told Stupe, we need an arch
- 00:07:25,156 --> 00:07:27,595 to pull this off. I told her 3 times at least.
- 00:07:27,695 --> 00:07:29,398 Then I get there and of course...
- 00:07:29,566 --> 00:07:31,001 Wormius: Lemme guess, no arch? Tyrannis: No arch.
- 00:07:31,101 --> 00:07:33,372 No military guard in shiny uniforms. Just me.
- 00:07:33,507 --> 00:07:37,381 And, as charismatic as I am, I needed pageantry.
- 00:07:37,481 --> 00:07:39,586 Wormius: That is beyond frustrating, Big Dog.
- 00:07:39,686 --> 00:07:41,155 We'll get things sorted. Don't worry about it.
- 00:07:41,255 --> 00:07:43,360 If you want your vision of a boulevard to be a reality,
- 00:07:43,460 --> 00:07:45,598 you should have the help of at least 100 men.
- 00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:47,067 You're the friggin' king, my man.
- 00:07:47,167 --> 00:07:48,303 You mind if I go ahead and make some hires?
- 00:07:48,436 --> 00:07:49,305 Tyrannis: Of course not!
- 00:07:49,438 --> 00:07:50,440 I'm glad someone gets it.
- 00:07:50,541 --> 00:07:51,777 Wormius: Sick. Oh, and, uh, Ty?
- 00:07:51,910 --> 00:07:53,480 When we're done here, people will forget
- 00:07:53,581 --> 00:07:55,017 Corinth even had a boulevard.
- 00:07:55,117 --> 00:07:56,953 Stupendous: How's everything going with your guy?
- 00:07:57,053 --> 00:07:59,492 Tyrannis: Fantastic. Wormius understands my vision
- 00:07:59,593 --> 00:08:00,994 in a way that you never could.
- 00:08:01,061 --> 00:08:03,299 Stupendous: If that's an insult, it's not landing,
- 00:08:03,433 --> 00:08:05,604 because I think your vision is dumb.
- 00:08:05,738 --> 00:08:07,608 Tyrannis: And I think you're a meathead for thinking that.
- 00:08:07,742 --> 00:08:09,211 Stupendous: Look at us breaking up peacefully.
- 00:08:09,311 --> 00:08:10,615 We really know each other.
- 00:08:10,715 --> 00:08:11,917 Tyrannis: How are things working out with Zan?
- 00:08:12,017 --> 00:08:13,286 Stupendous: He's an absolute dream.
- 00:08:13,386 --> 00:08:14,455 Zan: You are my sun and moon
- 00:08:14,556 --> 00:08:15,490 and if I ever disappoint you,
- 00:08:15,624 --> 00:08:16,693 my life will be forfeit.
- 00:08:16,793 --> 00:08:18,329 Stupendous: No! I want you alive!
- 00:08:18,462 --> 00:08:20,199 Zan: As you wish. And if I ever die,
- 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:21,570 I will kill myself in punishment.
- 00:08:21,670 --> 00:08:23,473 Stupendous: This coulda been yours.
- 00:08:23,607 --> 00:08:26,112 Tyrannis: And this... could have been yours.
- 00:08:26,245 --> 00:08:27,882 Do you have to hunch like that?
- 00:08:28,015 --> 00:08:29,853 Daphne: Ugh. How can you relax right now?
- 00:08:29,986 --> 00:08:31,724 Hippocampus: What? Oh, the parents thing?
- 00:08:31,824 --> 00:08:33,226 Daphne: Yes, "the parents thing"!
- 00:08:33,326 --> 00:08:34,896 How can you be so casual about this?
- 00:08:34,996 --> 00:08:36,299 Hippocampus: You're talking about the two most
- 00:08:36,399 --> 00:08:37,702 self-involved people on Earth.
- 00:08:37,835 --> 00:08:39,873 I learned a long time ago, if I get upset with them,
- 00:08:39,973 --> 00:08:41,576 they somehow take it as a compliment.
- 00:08:41,676 --> 00:08:43,079 Daphne: So, you're not going to say anything?
- 00:08:43,179 --> 00:08:45,116 Hippocampus: If I complain, they get more obnoxious.
- 00:08:45,216 --> 00:08:47,555 Oh, and we're invited to dinner with them tonight
- 00:08:47,688 --> 00:08:49,825 and I gave them a very passive aggressive "OK."
- 00:08:49,926 --> 00:08:52,164 Daphne: OK, why is it that you are the first to tell anyone
- 00:08:52,331 --> 00:08:55,003 when they're wrong, but you can't do that to your parents?
- 00:08:55,103 --> 00:08:56,607 Hippocampus: Trust me. Consequences of that
- 00:08:56,707 --> 00:08:57,909 are not worth the effort.
- 00:08:58,009 --> 00:09:00,648 Shlub: Did someone say double couple massage?
- 00:09:00,714 --> 00:09:01,850 Deliria: I did! I did!
- 00:09:01,950 --> 00:09:03,520 Tree masseuse: Any problem areas?
- 00:09:03,620 --> 00:09:04,723 Spots I should avoid?
- 00:09:04,823 --> 00:09:06,158 Deliria: Yes, but I prefer
- 00:09:06,292 --> 00:09:07,528 a human masseuse.
- 00:09:07,628 --> 00:09:09,064 Tree masseuse: They said you said no preference.
- 00:09:09,164 --> 00:09:11,035 Deliria: Well, I didn't think "bark for hands"
- 00:09:11,135 --> 00:09:13,139 was something I had to screen for.
- 00:09:13,272 --> 00:09:14,509 Why on Earth did you even
- 00:09:14,609 --> 00:09:16,479 get into the massage business with those hands?
- 00:09:16,580 --> 00:09:18,115 Tree masseuse: I like to help people relax.
- 00:09:18,215 --> 00:09:19,820 Deliria: Not with those hands, you don't.
- 00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:21,222 Tree masseuse: Mm. I think you're being prejudiced.
- 00:09:21,322 --> 00:09:23,727 Deliria: Yes, against being rubbed by kindling.
- 00:09:23,827 --> 00:09:25,096 Tree masseuse: OK, that's uncalled-for.
- 00:09:25,197 --> 00:09:26,766 Shlub: Darling, I can do the rubdown.
- 00:09:26,866 --> 00:09:28,369 Hippo, Daphne, why don't you
- 00:09:28,469 --> 00:09:29,806 get on the table first?
- 00:09:29,906 --> 00:09:31,375 Tree masseuse: Is it because I have aphids?
- 00:09:31,475 --> 00:09:33,547 Go ahead and say the word. Say the word!
- 00:09:33,647 --> 00:09:35,517 Stupendous: All right, warriors, look alive!
- 00:09:35,617 --> 00:09:37,387 Except Markus and Dimitrios.
- 00:09:37,555 --> 00:09:38,957 I know you guys are dead.
- 00:09:39,024 --> 00:09:39,692 What the?
- 00:09:39,792 --> 00:09:41,128 Zan: Soldiers! Ten-hut!
- 00:09:41,262 --> 00:09:42,230 Soldiers: General Stupendous!
- 00:09:42,364 --> 00:09:43,567 Your army is ready!
- 00:09:43,667 --> 00:09:45,369 Stupendous: What the hell am I looking at?
- 00:09:45,469 --> 00:09:47,809 Zan: I hope you don't mind. I've been drilling them.
- 00:09:47,942 --> 00:09:49,445 Stupendous: Oh, my God, I've been trying to get
- 00:09:49,546 --> 00:09:51,348 these guys to do straight lines forever.
- 00:09:51,449 --> 00:09:52,685 They're still kind of transitioning
- 00:09:52,818 --> 00:09:54,354 from horde to army. Zan: Yes.
- 00:09:54,455 --> 00:09:56,559 I've studied you, and I surmised that this would please you.
- 00:09:56,660 --> 00:09:57,995 Stupendous: Well, you got that right.
- 00:09:58,129 --> 00:09:59,866 So, you must know... Zan: That you've always
- 00:09:59,966 --> 00:10:02,037 tried to get them to do synchronized drills?
- 00:10:02,171 --> 00:10:03,472 Present...spears!
- 00:10:03,573 --> 00:10:04,776 And jab! And step!
- 00:10:04,876 --> 00:10:07,414 And jab, and step, and spin, and spin,
- 00:10:07,515 --> 00:10:09,719 and toss-toss-jab, and march in a square
- 00:10:09,852 --> 00:10:11,556 and march in a square and jab-jab-
- 00:10:11,723 --> 00:10:13,594 hands on hips, jab and present!
- 00:10:13,694 --> 00:10:15,296 Stupendous: This is the coolest thing ever.
- 00:10:15,430 --> 00:10:16,867 Everybody, give it up for Zan!
- 00:10:16,934 --> 00:10:18,804 [Soldiers chanting "Zan!"] Zan: No, no, no, please.
- 00:10:18,870 --> 00:10:20,373 I cannot accept this praise.
- 00:10:20,508 --> 00:10:22,612 I exist only to serve my General.
- 00:10:22,745 --> 00:10:24,816 What Stupendous wants, Zan does.
- 00:10:24,916 --> 00:10:26,887 Zan has no ego or agenda.
- 00:10:26,987 --> 00:10:29,659 There is no Zan. There is only Stupendous.
- 00:10:29,726 --> 00:10:31,295 Stupendous: OK, that's a little extreme.
- 00:10:31,428 --> 00:10:33,700 Zan: I have displeased you. If you want me to march
- 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,605 into the wilderness until death, I will.
- 00:10:35,705 --> 00:10:37,440 Stupendous: No! Could you just have them
- 00:10:37,508 --> 00:10:38,644 do the spinny thing again?
- 00:10:38,744 --> 00:10:41,015 Zan: Of course. And 5, 6, 7, 8!
- 00:10:41,148 --> 00:10:43,987 Tyrannis: Wow! Wormius, you absolutely nailed this.
- 00:10:44,087 --> 00:10:45,925 Wormius: You like? Tyrannis: I love.
- 00:10:46,025 --> 00:10:48,329 I'm gonna go re-launch this boulevard.
- 00:10:48,462 --> 00:10:49,599 Wormius: Bup-bup-bup! Not yet.
- 00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:51,035 [Trumpeters play fanfare]
- 00:10:51,135 --> 00:10:52,638 Tyrannis: You got the trumpets?
- 00:10:52,738 --> 00:10:54,008 Wormius: Yeah. Guess where I got 'em from?
- 00:10:54,141 --> 00:10:55,377 Tyrannis: Corinth? Wormius: I got 'em from
- 00:10:55,477 --> 00:10:56,846 the place Corinth gets 'em from.
- 00:10:56,946 --> 00:10:58,082 Tyrannis: Sick! And you got
- 00:10:58,182 --> 00:10:59,886 people to put on soldier costumes?
- 00:10:59,953 --> 00:11:02,090 Wormius: No, no, Ty. These are your new bodyguards.
- 00:11:02,190 --> 00:11:03,894 Remember I said you needed a staff of hundreds?
- 00:11:04,027 --> 00:11:05,764 You got your own personal security team now, buddy.
- 00:11:05,898 --> 00:11:07,768 Oh, speaking of, uh, you're gonna need to pay these guys.
- 00:11:07,868 --> 00:11:09,672 Is it cool if I go into the coffers and take care of it?
- 00:11:09,739 --> 00:11:12,712 Tyrannis: Oh, absolutely. All right, here I go.
- 00:11:12,812 --> 00:11:14,915 Citizens of Krapopolis! It is my honor
- 00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:18,823 to present to you, our Grand Boulevard!
- 00:11:21,630 --> 00:11:23,634 [Trumpeters play fanfare]
- 00:11:23,734 --> 00:11:27,609 Joshua: Oh, I get it now! All hail King Ty!
- 00:11:27,709 --> 00:11:29,411 [Citizens chanting "King Ty!"]
- 00:11:29,545 --> 00:11:31,583 Tyrannis: Do you want to hoist me on your shoulders?
- 00:11:31,717 --> 00:11:34,054 You can. Joshua: You bet!
- 00:11:34,154 --> 00:11:36,025 Tyrannis: What's happening? I want to ride shoulders!
- 00:11:36,125 --> 00:11:38,296 Wormius: Too risky. You know how many shoulder-borne
- 00:11:38,429 --> 00:11:40,266 poisons they got these days? I'm gonna have to dictate
- 00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:42,905 your movements from now on. Tyrannis: Dictate my movements?
- 00:11:43,038 --> 00:11:45,010 Wormius: All the top kings have their movements dictated.
- 00:11:45,110 --> 00:11:47,280 Tyrannis: I wanted a shoulder ride.
- 00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:50,721 Shlub: Oh, wow, now, that's a spicy meatball!
- 00:11:50,821 --> 00:11:52,825 Deliria: Meet me on the ceiling, darling!
- 00:11:52,925 --> 00:11:55,565 Shlub: I'm trying. I just don't want to throw out my back.
- 00:11:55,665 --> 00:11:56,833 Hippocampus: It's almost over.
- 00:11:56,934 --> 00:11:58,136 The ceiling is usually the last part.
- 00:11:58,236 --> 00:12:00,339 Daphne: You know their sex routine?
- 00:12:00,439 --> 00:12:01,676 Hippocampus: Everyone does.
- 00:12:01,776 --> 00:12:02,945 Daphne: And you're seriously
- 00:12:03,045 --> 00:12:04,080 not gonna confront them.
- 00:12:04,181 --> 00:12:05,617 Hippocampus: He's a literal monster
- 00:12:05,717 --> 00:12:06,954 and she's a literal god.
- 00:12:07,054 --> 00:12:08,289 If they want to ruin my life,
- 00:12:08,389 --> 00:12:09,257 they're gonna do it.
- 00:12:09,358 --> 00:12:10,694 Daphne: OK, well, if you're not gonna
- 00:12:10,861 --> 00:12:11,997 stand up to them, I will.
- 00:12:12,097 --> 00:12:15,003 Hippocampus: Uh, you can't just--Wait!
- 00:12:15,103 --> 00:12:17,341 Daphne: Hey! Stop it! Shlub: Dreadfully sorry.
- 00:12:17,441 --> 00:12:18,910 So rude of us to exclude you.
- 00:12:18,977 --> 00:12:21,415 Daphne: You two need to leave. Hippocampus: Uh, Daphne...
- 00:12:21,583 --> 00:12:23,285 Daphne: This is our romantic getaway.
- 00:12:23,419 --> 00:12:24,589 Deliria: Excuse me?
- 00:12:24,689 --> 00:12:25,958 Hippocampus: This is not good. I--
- 00:12:26,092 --> 00:12:27,561 Daphne: Your son is too afraid to say this,
- 00:12:27,662 --> 00:12:28,830 but it needs to be said. You are being
- 00:12:28,964 --> 00:12:31,301 rude, insensitive, and inconsiderate,
- 00:12:31,435 --> 00:12:32,571 and you have turned a normally
- 00:12:32,671 --> 00:12:34,642 strong-willed man into a scared son.
- 00:12:34,709 --> 00:12:35,811 He's afraid to stand up to you,
- 00:12:35,911 --> 00:12:37,715 which I'm finding very unsexy.
- 00:12:37,815 --> 00:12:39,852 Deliria: Hmm. I appreciate the correction.
- 00:12:40,019 --> 00:12:41,523 Daphne and Hippocampus: You do? Deliria: Yes.
- 00:12:41,590 --> 00:12:43,225 Even though I'm a goddess,
- 00:12:43,325 --> 00:12:44,194 I'm not unreasonable.
- 00:12:44,294 --> 00:12:46,465 I'm always happy to take criticism
- 00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:48,269 from a wretched, little worm!
- 00:12:48,369 --> 00:12:50,808 Daphne: Aah! Hippocampus: There it is.
- 00:12:50,908 --> 00:12:53,947 Mom, could you please turn Daphne back?
- 00:12:54,047 --> 00:12:56,118 Deliria: When I'm ready.
- 00:12:56,218 --> 00:12:59,357 Zan: General, please, let me shop for you.
- 00:12:59,491 --> 00:13:02,330 Stupendous: Zan, are you dressing like me?
- 00:13:02,430 --> 00:13:03,365 Zan: Yes, for there is
- 00:13:03,465 --> 00:13:04,569 no other way to dress.
- 00:13:04,669 --> 00:13:06,004 You are the one true warrior
- 00:13:06,138 --> 00:13:07,875 and all of my focus is on you.
- 00:13:07,975 --> 00:13:09,579 Stupendous: You could tone it down just a bit, though.
- 00:13:09,679 --> 00:13:10,881 Zan: All I want is to please you.
- 00:13:11,014 --> 00:13:12,951 You're all I see! All I think about!
- 00:13:13,052 --> 00:13:14,555 All I dream about!
- 00:13:14,656 --> 00:13:16,425 I just wish I could be in your skin.
- 00:13:16,492 --> 00:13:20,400 I wish I could be you. Just literally become you.
- 00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:21,636 Is that weird?
- 00:13:21,770 --> 00:13:24,074 Stupendous: Uh...no.
- 00:13:24,208 --> 00:13:25,911 [Fly buzzing]
- 00:13:29,686 --> 00:13:31,255 Wormius: All right. You'll be safe here.
- 00:13:31,355 --> 00:13:33,927 This is basically where you're gonna be most of the time now.
- 00:13:34,060 --> 00:13:35,063 Tyrannis: It just looks a little...
- 00:13:35,129 --> 00:13:36,432 Wormius: Secure? You betcha.
- 00:13:36,566 --> 00:13:37,969 You're gonna be staying in here most of the day.
- 00:13:38,069 --> 00:13:39,506 It's just easier to keep you in one place.
- 00:13:39,673 --> 00:13:41,008 You're too important to roam around.
- 00:13:41,108 --> 00:13:43,045 Tyrannis: But what do I do if I want a sandwich?
- 00:13:43,145 --> 00:13:44,715 Wormius: Great question. You get all that stuff through me.
- 00:13:44,815 --> 00:13:45,918 Uh, hey, guys! Get those windows
- 00:13:45,984 --> 00:13:47,154 blocked up for the king, OK?
- 00:13:47,254 --> 00:13:48,924 And how we coming on those new door locks?
- 00:13:49,058 --> 00:13:50,528 Tyrannis: Shouldn't the locks be on my side?
- 00:13:50,628 --> 00:13:51,897 Wormius: Nah-nah-nah. You don't want to have to
- 00:13:51,997 --> 00:13:53,365 deal with all that rigamarole.
- 00:13:53,465 --> 00:13:55,070 Tyrannis: Yeah, see, that's what I'm wondering.
- 00:13:55,236 --> 00:13:57,040 I know you're here to help me, which is great.
- 00:13:57,174 --> 00:13:58,476 I just think it's almost like
- 00:13:58,577 --> 00:14:01,382 now you're in charge of me, if that makes sense.
- 00:14:01,448 --> 00:14:03,385 Wormius: See, this is why you're the big dog, Big Dog.
- 00:14:03,452 --> 00:14:05,791 That's a great idea. How about you give me that door key?
- 00:14:05,891 --> 00:14:08,396 Tyrannis: I...am thinking that is not a request.
- 00:14:08,496 --> 00:14:10,333 Wormius: Wow, I knew you'd be great to work with.
- 00:14:10,467 --> 00:14:11,970 Nothing needs to be explained to you.
- 00:14:12,103 --> 00:14:14,307 Guys, help King Ty decide to give me the door key.
- 00:14:14,408 --> 00:14:16,979 Oh, and I couldn't get into the treasury to pay your guys,
- 00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:18,650 so, I'm gonna need that key, as well.
- 00:14:18,784 --> 00:14:21,923 Tyrannis: You need my door key and the key to the treasury?
- 00:14:22,023 --> 00:14:23,258 Wormius: Yeah. It's called delegating.
- 00:14:23,359 --> 00:14:25,831 Tyrannis: It feels a bit like a coup.
- 00:14:25,931 --> 00:14:27,333 Wormius: Can't get anything past this guy.
- 00:14:27,433 --> 00:14:28,703 You're way ahead of me.
- 00:14:29,337 --> 00:14:30,641 Tyrannis: [Gulp] Wormius: Ooh!
- 00:14:30,741 --> 00:14:32,511 Did you literally just gulp, bro?
- 00:14:32,611 --> 00:14:34,515 Tyrannis: There was something in my throat. The timing was weird.
- 00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:36,886 Wormius: Sounded like one of those "Oh, no" gulps, you know?
- 00:14:36,986 --> 00:14:38,524 Tyrannis: I can see why you would think that,
- 00:14:38,590 --> 00:14:40,193 but there's something going on with my throat,
- 00:14:40,293 --> 00:14:42,397 some kind of spasm or...[Gulp] Wormius: Oh!
- 00:14:42,463 --> 00:14:44,467 OK, you're trying to tell me that that one wasn't--
- 00:14:44,602 --> 00:14:45,937 Tyrannis: It wasn't!
- 00:14:48,109 --> 00:14:51,582 [Gulping] OK, I gotta get this checked out.
- 00:14:56,025 --> 00:14:57,027 [Door opens] Wormius: Morning, King!
- 00:14:57,160 --> 00:14:58,162 How was your kingly sleep?
- 00:14:58,262 --> 00:14:59,599 Tyrannis: Scary and claustrophobic
- 00:14:59,766 --> 00:15:01,135 with strong hints of absolute failure.
- 00:15:01,268 --> 00:15:02,605 Wormius: Oh, I think of it as snug.
- 00:15:02,738 --> 00:15:03,840 Anyway, here's your crown.
- 00:15:03,940 --> 00:15:05,109 Stick that on the old noggin
- 00:15:05,210 --> 00:15:06,913 and, uh, let's go talk to the staff.
- 00:15:06,980 --> 00:15:08,382 Tyrannis: The staff? Wormius: Yeah, you gotta make
- 00:15:08,482 --> 00:15:09,852 some announcements, throw your weight around.
- 00:15:09,919 --> 00:15:11,088 You know, tell 'em who's in charge.
- 00:15:11,188 --> 00:15:12,558 Tyrannis: Who would that be exactly?
- 00:15:12,658 --> 00:15:14,696 Wormius: Ha ha! Oh, fantastic.
- 00:15:14,796 --> 00:15:16,966 Love this guy. Help him along, will you?
- 00:15:17,066 --> 00:15:19,037 Tyrannis: Hello, everyone. Thank you for coming here.
- 00:15:19,171 --> 00:15:21,041 Wormius: Great. Now tell them they're all fired.
- 00:15:21,174 --> 00:15:22,678 Tyrannis: They're all fired? Wormius: There it is,
- 00:15:22,778 --> 00:15:23,814 straight from the horse's mouth.
- 00:15:23,914 --> 00:15:25,182 I did everything I could, guys.
- 00:15:25,282 --> 00:15:26,753 [Crowd gasps] Wormius: Now here you go.
- 00:15:26,886 --> 00:15:28,523 Hand this back to me. And, OK!
- 00:15:28,623 --> 00:15:31,195 You've all witnessed the king handing me the official signet.
- 00:15:31,295 --> 00:15:32,765 Only the Hand of the King wears it, and when he
- 00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:34,401 wears it, he speaks for the king.
- 00:15:34,468 --> 00:15:35,369 [Crowd grumbling]
- 00:15:35,469 --> 00:15:37,006 Wormius: Oh, you and you, stick around.
- 00:15:37,106 --> 00:15:38,409 You're gonna need to build me a bigger office,
- 00:15:38,510 --> 00:15:40,146 but then you're out. Sorry. My hands are tied.
- 00:15:40,279 --> 00:15:42,050 Tyrannis: You can't do this! Wormius: Do what, King?
- 00:15:42,117 --> 00:15:43,753 You wanna tell everyone what's happening here?
- 00:15:43,854 --> 00:15:45,891 That you've lost control of your kingdom?
- 00:15:45,991 --> 00:15:47,929 How would that go over? Hmm?
- 00:15:48,029 --> 00:15:49,999 Tyrannis: [Gulp] All right, that one--
- 00:15:50,099 --> 00:15:53,707 that was an "Oh, no" gulp. [Gulping]
- 00:15:53,807 --> 00:15:55,076 And it set off the other gulps!
- 00:15:55,176 --> 00:15:58,550 Ahh! Damn it! [Gulping]
- 00:15:58,617 --> 00:16:01,656 [Hippocampus sighs] Could I have another pure grain alcohol,
- 00:16:01,756 --> 00:16:03,425 and a leaf for my girlfriend?
- 00:16:03,526 --> 00:16:05,396 I warned you. You're eating leaves now,
- 00:16:05,496 --> 00:16:07,167 all because you didn't believe me when I said
- 00:16:07,267 --> 00:16:09,572 don't pick a fight with my parents.
- 00:16:10,641 --> 00:16:12,109 You can't talk, can you?
- 00:16:13,446 --> 00:16:15,550 Hippocampus: You're probably saying I got some nerve.
- 00:16:15,650 --> 00:16:17,186 This was all my doing.
- 00:16:19,190 --> 00:16:20,594 Hippocampus: Now you're probably saying the problem is
- 00:16:20,694 --> 00:16:22,865 I didn't have any nerve. You at least tried.
- 00:16:22,965 --> 00:16:24,100 You stood up for yourself.
- 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:25,838 Even now, as a caterpillar,
- 00:16:25,938 --> 00:16:28,275 you've got more backbone than I'll ever have.
- 00:16:29,011 --> 00:16:30,079 Hippocampus: You're right!
- 00:16:30,179 --> 00:16:31,749 Nerve has never been the problem.
- 00:16:31,816 --> 00:16:36,091 The problem was I lost track of what's important!
- 00:16:37,326 --> 00:16:39,766 Hippocampus: You know what? I just might!
- 00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:41,468 [Deliria and Shlub laughing]
- 00:16:41,569 --> 00:16:43,072 Hippocampus: Mom, Dad, I want to be here
- 00:16:43,205 --> 00:16:44,374 alone with my girlfriend.
- 00:16:44,474 --> 00:16:45,978 You may not understand boundaries,
- 00:16:46,112 --> 00:16:47,948 but I demand them!
- 00:16:48,115 --> 00:16:49,952 Deliria: Do you know who you're talking to?
- 00:16:50,119 --> 00:16:51,388 Hippocampus: Yes! And I'm not a god,
- 00:16:51,488 --> 00:16:54,127 but I'm your son, and I'm telling you to leave.
- 00:16:54,261 --> 00:16:56,131 Deliria: Well...I... Hippocampus: And you need to
- 00:16:56,231 --> 00:16:57,802 turn her back. Shlub: Are you sure?
- 00:16:57,935 --> 00:16:59,204 A caterpillar can go places
- 00:16:59,270 --> 00:17:00,741 Drafty would never fit.
- 00:17:00,874 --> 00:17:03,547 Hippocampus: Daphne. Turn her back.
- 00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:07,019 Deliria: Fine, if she apologizes for insulting me.
- 00:17:07,120 --> 00:17:08,623 Hippocampus: She will not apologize
- 00:17:08,756 --> 00:17:11,094 and you will turn her back.
- 00:17:12,063 --> 00:17:14,134 In fact, you'll apologize to her!
- 00:17:14,267 --> 00:17:16,873 Oh--OK, OK. I'll apologize to her.
- 00:17:16,940 --> 00:17:18,275 Deliria: Ugh.
- 00:17:19,144 --> 00:17:23,687 Daphne: Oh, Hippo. I love leaf.
- 00:17:23,787 --> 00:17:25,557 Do you know where leaf?
- 00:17:26,458 --> 00:17:27,795 Wormius: What a productive day.
- 00:17:27,895 --> 00:17:29,131 Look at you, getting stuff done.
- 00:17:29,231 --> 00:17:30,567 Night night! Tyrannis: I just woke up!
- 00:17:30,667 --> 00:17:32,972 Wormius: Yup. Big day tomorrow. Get some sleep!
- 00:17:33,740 --> 00:17:35,544 Guard: You think he would ever try to escape?
- 00:17:35,678 --> 00:17:37,347 Wormius: Oh, well, the only way out of that room
- 00:17:37,447 --> 00:17:39,050 is through the toilet. I don't think he's that dumb.
- 00:17:39,150 --> 00:17:40,185 Tyrannis: Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God,
- 00:17:40,286 --> 00:17:41,188 oh, God, oh, God.
- 00:17:41,254 --> 00:17:42,224 No, no, no, not good.
- 00:17:42,290 --> 00:17:43,760 Dirty, dirty, nasty, nasty,
- 00:17:43,927 --> 00:17:45,865 ew, ew, ew, ew, ew...
- 00:17:45,965 --> 00:17:48,101 Aah! Oh!
- 00:17:51,609 --> 00:17:53,378 Stupendous: Zan? Zan: Oh, General,
- 00:17:53,513 --> 00:17:54,848 I was just collecting your hair.
- 00:17:54,949 --> 00:17:56,285 If that's not OK, I'll kill myself.
- 00:17:56,418 --> 00:17:58,923 Stupendous: It's not OK, and don't kill yourself.
- 00:17:58,990 --> 00:18:00,528 Zan: But I just want to be you!
- 00:18:00,628 --> 00:18:03,700 All I want to be in life is you, Stupendous!
- 00:18:03,833 --> 00:18:05,737 Stupendous: You need to stop. Zan: I can't!
- 00:18:05,837 --> 00:18:08,308 And if I were you, I'd tell me the same thing!
- 00:18:08,408 --> 00:18:11,148 I'm so devoted to you, I'm losing myself!
- 00:18:11,248 --> 00:18:12,918 It's happened before. My name's not even Zan.
- 00:18:13,085 --> 00:18:14,387 That was the last guy I worked for.
- 00:18:14,454 --> 00:18:16,191 Tyrannis: Stupe, I need you. Stupendous: Ty!
- 00:18:16,291 --> 00:18:18,028 Where have you been, and why do you smell like that?
- 00:18:18,128 --> 00:18:19,698 Tyrannis: I was inside the toilet, and...
- 00:18:19,832 --> 00:18:22,304 I was inside the toilet. Stupendous: Got it.
- 00:18:22,370 --> 00:18:23,740 Tyrannis: I completely screwed up.
- 00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:25,777 That guy stole the kingdom right out from under me.
- 00:18:25,877 --> 00:18:28,516 He seduced me with smooth talk, and now I'm a puppet king,
- 00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:31,088 locked in my bedroom. I should never have fired you!
- 00:18:31,188 --> 00:18:32,592 Stupendous: You didn't fire me.
- 00:18:32,692 --> 00:18:34,060 Tyrannis: I certainly did, but I shouldn't have.
- 00:18:34,127 --> 00:18:35,229 Stupendous: Nope, I quit,
- 00:18:35,329 --> 00:18:36,633 but I shouldn't have.
- 00:18:36,733 --> 00:18:38,135 Tyrannis: Pretty sure I fired you, even though
- 00:18:38,235 --> 00:18:39,772 I really got my comeuppance for it.
- 00:18:39,873 --> 00:18:41,576 Stupendous: No way you would have had the balls to fire me.
- 00:18:41,676 --> 00:18:42,611 I broke it off first.
- 00:18:42,678 --> 00:18:44,447 And, boy, did I pay the price for it.
- 00:18:44,548 --> 00:18:46,251 Zan: Hey, brother. There's two of me now,
- 00:18:46,384 --> 00:18:47,688 by the way. Pretty cool.
- 00:18:47,788 --> 00:18:49,090 Two identical Stupes.
- 00:18:49,223 --> 00:18:51,094 Tyrannis: Did you... Zan: Gouge out my own eye?
- 00:18:51,261 --> 00:18:54,535 No, because I never had it. I'm a cyclops!
- 00:18:55,871 --> 00:18:57,373 Tyrannis: All right, I think the prices we both paid
- 00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:59,044 are about equal. I lost my kingdom
- 00:18:59,144 --> 00:19:00,581 and you've got whatever that is.
- 00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:02,518 Either way, I'm sorry, for firing you.
- 00:19:02,618 --> 00:19:03,953 Stupendous: So am I, for quitting,
- 00:19:04,053 --> 00:19:05,389 because you didn't fire me.
- 00:19:05,489 --> 00:19:06,692 Tyrannis: Yes, I did. Stupendous: No, you didn't.
- 00:19:06,859 --> 00:19:07,728 Tyrannis: Yes, I did. So,
- 00:19:07,861 --> 00:19:08,864 how do we get out of this?
- 00:19:08,964 --> 00:19:10,199 You go in and fight my battle
- 00:19:10,299 --> 00:19:11,468 for me like the good, old days?
- 00:19:11,602 --> 00:19:12,872 Stupendous: No. Wormius has, like,
- 00:19:12,972 --> 00:19:13,907 a million goons now,
- 00:19:14,007 --> 00:19:15,209 and I'm just me.
- 00:19:15,309 --> 00:19:16,880 Wait a minute...
- 00:19:17,615 --> 00:19:20,019 Wormius: Gentlemen, a toast! Guards: Hear, hear!
- 00:19:20,119 --> 00:19:22,858 Wormius: I gotta say, this was probably our easiest one yet.
- 00:19:22,958 --> 00:19:25,429 I mean, did you see him when he handed me the keys?
- 00:19:25,530 --> 00:19:27,868 No struggle at all! [Guards laugh]
- 00:19:27,968 --> 00:19:30,039 Wormius: Oh, it's great taking advantage of people.
- 00:19:30,139 --> 00:19:31,810 I just play to their vanity, and they
- 00:19:31,910 --> 00:19:33,179 practically fleece themselves.
- 00:19:33,279 --> 00:19:34,348 I mean, you know all this.
- 00:19:34,448 --> 00:19:35,717 I just love talking about it.
- 00:19:35,817 --> 00:19:36,719 Guard: No, no, we love
- 00:19:36,819 --> 00:19:37,855 talking about it, too!
- 00:19:37,955 --> 00:19:39,391 Wormius: Booyah! OK, let's, uh,
- 00:19:39,457 --> 00:19:42,197 split the loot, head out. Uh-oh.
- 00:19:42,297 --> 00:19:44,334 Someone's not where they're supposed to be.
- 00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:46,605 Tyrannis: Yeah. You.
- 00:19:46,706 --> 00:19:48,209 Wormius: Ahahaha!
- 00:19:48,276 --> 00:19:49,712 What are ya-- what are ya thinkin'?
- 00:19:49,846 --> 00:19:52,584 There are a ton of us and just one of you.
- 00:19:52,718 --> 00:19:56,158 Stupendous: Actually two. [Cup clatters on floor]
- 00:19:56,258 --> 00:19:58,729 [Stupendous and guards screaming]
- 00:20:01,936 --> 00:20:04,274 Tyrannis: Seems like you two have it under control.
- 00:20:04,441 --> 00:20:06,044 I would just be in your way at this point.
- 00:20:06,144 --> 00:20:07,748 Don't need another body in the mix.
- 00:20:07,848 --> 00:20:10,052 Stupendous: Uhh! Tyrannis: I know once you're
- 00:20:10,152 --> 00:20:12,558 fighting with a partner, you get in a flow.
- 00:20:12,658 --> 00:20:13,994 Wouldn't want to mess that up.
- 00:20:14,094 --> 00:20:15,262 Really the smart move here is
- 00:20:15,362 --> 00:20:17,133 for one of us to stay fresh.
- 00:20:17,233 --> 00:20:19,337 Probably should go back and get my sword.
- 00:20:19,437 --> 00:20:21,576 That's what I should do. I'll just...head out and--
- 00:20:21,709 --> 00:20:23,378 Oh, excellent, you've got it done.
- 00:20:23,445 --> 00:20:26,051 Well done, you two. Well, well done, us, really.
- 00:20:26,151 --> 00:20:27,419 So, I've got my Number Two back?
- 00:20:27,521 --> 00:20:30,058 Stupendous: If I've got my king back.
- 00:20:30,827 --> 00:20:35,402 Zan: Oh, I'll just get right in...Mmmm.
- 00:20:35,503 --> 00:20:36,806 Tyrannis: Not weird at all.
- 00:20:41,916 --> 00:20:45,757 Satyr bellhop: I'm sorry. The hot tubs are closed today.
- 00:20:47,227 --> 00:20:50,032 Very sorry. The hot tubs are closed.
- 00:20:51,268 --> 00:20:52,605 Terribly sorry for the inconvenience.
- 00:20:52,705 --> 00:20:55,075 The hot tubs are out of order.
- 00:20:55,242 --> 00:20:57,714 The next one, as well, all of the hot tubs.
- 00:20:57,814 --> 00:21:01,020 Yes, that one, too, all of the hot tubs.
- 00:21:02,456 --> 00:21:04,561 Oh, I wish I could say they were in order.
- 00:21:04,661 --> 00:21:07,100 They're still out of order.
- 00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:09,036 Very sorry for the inconvenience.
- 00:21:09,137 --> 00:21:11,675 No hot tubs today, sir. Cleaner: Aah!
- 00:21:11,776 --> 00:21:13,747 Satyr bellhop: Not today, I'm afraid.
- 00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:15,517 Wish I had better news.
- 00:21:16,384 --> 00:21:18,222 I'm so sorry. I would definitely
- 00:21:18,322 --> 00:21:19,591 not go in that one.
- 00:21:19,691 --> 00:21:22,230 Oh, no, no, no, not that one, most especially.
- 00:21:22,330 --> 00:21:24,568 That one is most definitely closed.
- 00:21:25,269 --> 00:21:26,639 All of them are closed.
- 00:21:26,739 --> 00:21:29,244 That one is definitely out of order.
- 00:21:29,411 --> 00:21:30,547 Closed. So sorry.
- 00:21:30,814 --> 00:21:32,617 Dan Harmon: Did you get any of that?
- 00:21:34,689 --> 00:21:35,957 Voice: Bento. [People cheer]
Скриншоты

























