Погодная палка
Описание
Во время сухого сезона Тираннис отвечает на вопросы Брутуса, Мириам и Джошуа о том, когда закончится сухой сезон, заявляя, что им следует пережить его, устроив Сухой фестиваль с поэтическими выступлениями. Столкнувшись с требованиями прекратить сухой сезон, Тираннис рассказывает своей семье о своих требованиях. Шлуб убеждает Тиранниса схитрить, показав погодную палку, которую он получил от жителей Плейса. После того, как грязевой костюм не срабатывает, Тираннис использует погодную палку, чтобы создавать бассейн, который нравится даже детёнышу Харибде, запускать орошение для фермера, обеспечивать ванной комнату для сирот, создавать пруд для парня и поливать кактус женщины. Это продолжается до тех пор, пока погодная палка не перестаёт работать, и жители Плейса во главе с вождём Равди не осаждают Крапополис, желая вернуть погодную палку, которую Шлуб украл у них во время Фестиваля Дружбы. Тем временем Шлуб убеждает Делирию разрешить своим солдатам охладиться в её храме, поскольку Гиппокамп планирует скрестить солдат с орнитологами, чтобы создать суперграждан.
Субтитры
- 00:00:04,543 --> 00:00:06,246 Thank you all for coming out.
- 00:00:06,346 --> 00:00:08,718 I know dry season has been hard on all of us.
- 00:00:08,851 --> 00:00:09,953 When is this gonna be over?
- 00:00:10,087 --> 00:00:11,657 I'm tired of drinking sand.
- 00:00:11,824 --> 00:00:15,030 My pee stream is like half of what it used to be.
- 00:00:15,130 --> 00:00:17,034 I get it. We all hate dry season.
- 00:00:17,167 --> 00:00:19,038 But there are benefits. Dry season drives
- 00:00:19,138 --> 00:00:21,241 the tickle trolls north, far away from here.
- 00:00:21,242 --> 00:00:23,515 What's so bad about the tickle trolls? They sound fun.
- 00:00:23,648 --> 00:00:25,284 Trust me, they gave themselves that name
- 00:00:25,384 --> 00:00:27,221 to lure you in. They are ruthless!
- 00:00:27,321 --> 00:00:29,225 But we'll get through this, and as we all know,
- 00:00:29,325 --> 00:00:31,295 surviving hardship together is what creates a sense
- 00:00:31,462 --> 00:00:32,933 of community. Does it?
- 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,639 Yes, sometimes! So, to help us all get through it,
- 00:00:35,739 --> 00:00:38,243 I've organized Dry Fest. We're making it fun,
- 00:00:38,376 --> 00:00:40,314 like we did with swarming locust season.
- 00:00:40,414 --> 00:00:42,318 No one enjoyed Locust Fest.
- 00:00:42,451 --> 00:00:43,788 I seem to remember you
- 00:00:43,888 --> 00:00:45,191 winning the locust-eating contest.
- 00:00:45,324 --> 00:00:48,029 They flew into my mouth when I yawned.
- 00:00:48,163 --> 00:00:49,298 Are you gonna give your medal back?
- 00:00:49,398 --> 00:00:50,935 Let's not go crazy.
- 00:00:51,036 --> 00:00:52,438 OK, then. We've got a lot
- 00:00:52,573 --> 00:00:54,341 of fun dry-season activities planned.
- 00:00:54,342 --> 00:00:56,212 Later on, we'll have a slam poetry contest
- 00:00:56,346 --> 00:00:58,116 called "What I Hate About Dry Season!"
- 00:00:58,216 --> 00:00:59,586 This sucks! Yeah!
- 00:00:59,753 --> 00:01:01,455 Man 2: Window dressing at best! I'm sorry.
- 00:01:01,590 --> 00:01:03,260 What do you want me to do? Fix my melted house!
- 00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:04,963 Strengthen my pee stream!
- 00:01:05,097 --> 00:01:07,167 Can you just make it less dry?
- 00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:08,637 Are you seriously criticizing me
- 00:01:08,737 --> 00:01:11,075 for the weather now? Hey, you signed up
- 00:01:11,076 --> 00:01:13,045 for this when you called yourself king.
- 00:01:13,046 --> 00:01:14,549 I see this as more of a referendum
- 00:01:14,649 --> 00:01:16,252 on his leadership in general.
- 00:01:16,352 --> 00:01:18,156 Scott, slam poetry style: Season's too dry,
- 00:01:18,256 --> 00:01:20,193 dust in my eye! Pee stream's light
- 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:21,697 and I blame King Ty!
- 00:01:21,797 --> 00:01:25,036 It's more of a referendum on his leadership in general.
- 00:01:25,136 --> 00:01:27,976 Whoo-hoo! Yeah!
- 00:01:28,076 --> 00:01:29,980 Slam poetry's canceled!
- 00:01:51,089 --> 00:01:53,393 Whoo!
- 00:01:55,531 --> 00:01:57,468 It was one thing when they blamed me
- 00:01:57,569 --> 00:01:59,138 for the grain shortage. That's on me
- 00:01:59,239 --> 00:02:00,740 for storing the grain in the pig pen.
- 00:02:00,741 --> 00:02:02,746 And I'll take the hit for the pig obesity problem, too.
- 00:02:02,846 --> 00:02:04,648 But the citizens are being unreasonable here.
- 00:02:04,649 --> 00:02:07,922 I'd say you've got yourself a popularity problem.
- 00:02:08,056 --> 00:02:10,492 I got a problem. My soldiers keep deserting
- 00:02:10,493 --> 00:02:13,166 because of the heat, and the punishment for deserters
- 00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:14,536 is I gotta club 'em.
- 00:02:14,636 --> 00:02:16,473 Which wastes my arm for like a day and a half.
- 00:02:16,574 --> 00:02:19,144 Isn't there a place my soldiers could cool off?
- 00:02:19,278 --> 00:02:20,849 OK, this is one I can solve.
- 00:02:20,982 --> 00:02:22,351 Mom, your temple is nice and cool.
- 00:02:22,451 --> 00:02:24,154 Could Stupe's soldiers use that as their barracks?
- 00:02:24,288 --> 00:02:27,193 Absolutely not! My temple is for my worshipers.
- 00:02:27,194 --> 00:02:28,963 Aren't you overstating the number of worshipers
- 00:02:28,964 --> 00:02:31,236 you have by making it plural? For your information,
- 00:02:31,336 --> 00:02:33,240 I have picked up a small contingent
- 00:02:33,340 --> 00:02:35,243 of very dedicated worshipers, who love
- 00:02:35,343 --> 00:02:37,114 watching me turn into various birds.
- 00:02:37,214 --> 00:02:38,783 Bird watchers? Yes!
- 00:02:38,784 --> 00:02:40,688 Stupe, just convert your soldiers to Mom worshipers.
- 00:02:40,789 --> 00:02:43,460 That won't fly. You know who soldiers worship.
- 00:02:43,561 --> 00:02:45,998 I can't say her name. You can say it.
- 00:02:46,099 --> 00:02:48,436 I have no problem hearing her name.
- 00:02:48,571 --> 00:02:51,309 Athena. Never say her name!
- 00:02:51,409 --> 00:02:53,179 That was a test and you failed.
- 00:02:53,313 --> 00:02:55,217 Ty, I'm working on something that can cool
- 00:02:55,317 --> 00:02:57,689 everyone down. It's called air conditioning.
- 00:02:57,789 --> 00:02:59,425 How does it work? No idea,
- 00:02:59,526 --> 00:03:01,262 I only have the name so far. Well,
- 00:03:01,362 --> 00:03:03,298 in the meantime, can you just make the citizens heartier
- 00:03:03,299 --> 00:03:05,370 and not such crybabies? Are we talking
- 00:03:05,470 --> 00:03:07,809 about... selective breeding?
- 00:03:07,909 --> 00:03:10,080 Cuz just say the word. I'll start the program.
- 00:03:10,180 --> 00:03:11,517 I'm itching to do it with humans.
- 00:03:11,651 --> 00:03:13,286 No! No selective breeding.
- 00:03:13,386 --> 00:03:15,357 People should be free to choose their life partners
- 00:03:15,457 --> 00:03:17,328 through the tried and true system
- 00:03:17,428 --> 00:03:19,165 of arranged marriages and brides for land.
- 00:03:19,265 --> 00:03:20,767 Mom, can we please use your temple?
- 00:03:20,768 --> 00:03:22,605 As long as no one says that name.
- 00:03:22,705 --> 00:03:24,208 Great. I'll get started.
- 00:03:24,308 --> 00:03:25,978 There's gonna be plenty of room if we rip out
- 00:03:26,078 --> 00:03:27,247 a few friezes and parapets.
- 00:03:27,381 --> 00:03:28,651 Don't touch my parapets!
- 00:03:28,751 --> 00:03:30,654 Son, I really hate to see you so down.
- 00:03:30,755 --> 00:03:33,226 I think I know what you need to do.
- 00:03:33,326 --> 00:03:35,197 Yes, just accept that there are times
- 00:03:35,297 --> 00:03:37,234 in a king's reign when he isn't universally beloved.
- 00:03:37,334 --> 00:03:39,238 I was going to say cheat. Cheat?
- 00:03:39,372 --> 00:03:41,610 Let me show you something.
- 00:03:41,710 --> 00:03:44,182 It's in here somewhere. What is this stuff?
- 00:03:44,282 --> 00:03:46,218 I've been alive for thousands of years.
- 00:03:46,318 --> 00:03:48,255 I've collected a few magic items in that time.
- 00:03:48,256 --> 00:03:50,728 Oh, is this a genie in a lamp?
- 00:03:50,828 --> 00:03:53,198 Not quite. It's an orgy in a lamp.
- 00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:54,902 Be careful with it.
- 00:03:54,903 --> 00:03:56,840 Woman, robocall voice: Good morning, Master.
- 00:03:56,940 --> 00:03:59,478 You have one orgy left.
- 00:03:59,579 --> 00:04:00,948 Nope, false alarm.
- 00:04:01,048 --> 00:04:02,753 I'm saving you for a special occasion.
- 00:04:07,060 --> 00:04:08,363 Ah, here it is.
- 00:04:08,463 --> 00:04:10,367 This is a weather stick. You can control
- 00:04:10,467 --> 00:04:12,337 the elements with it.
- 00:04:12,438 --> 00:04:14,508 Whoa! Where did you get this?
- 00:04:14,509 --> 00:04:17,180 I got it from my friends, the Placeans.
- 00:04:17,280 --> 00:04:20,020 It's quite flexible if you know how to use it.
- 00:04:22,224 --> 00:04:24,261 Now, you and I both know you have a hard time
- 00:04:24,395 --> 00:04:26,298 getting people to like you. Of course.
- 00:04:26,299 --> 00:04:28,236 Because I'm an authority figure. Sure,
- 00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:30,240 let's say it's that. But in my thousands of years
- 00:04:30,340 --> 00:04:32,645 on this earth, one thing has always been true:
- 00:04:32,779 --> 00:04:34,783 everyone loves you if you have a pool.
- 00:04:34,883 --> 00:04:36,753 That is true. But I'm not going to cheat
- 00:04:36,854 --> 00:04:40,059 just to get people to love me. Dry season serves a purpose.
- 00:04:40,060 --> 00:04:41,530 It drives the tickle trolls north.
- 00:04:41,630 --> 00:04:43,667 Also, surviving hardships together is what creates
- 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:46,206 a sense of community is what I'm telling them.
- 00:04:46,306 --> 00:04:48,243 Suit yourself. If you'll excuse me,
- 00:04:48,376 --> 00:04:50,346 it's nap time. If Daddy doesn't nap,
- 00:04:50,447 --> 00:04:53,419 Daddy gets cranky.
- 00:04:53,554 --> 00:04:55,490 Ugh, this heat is unbearable.
- 00:04:55,592 --> 00:04:57,427 Look at my bowl. I've got an algae bloom!
- 00:04:57,562 --> 00:04:59,532 All right, guys, this is your new barracks.
- 00:04:59,666 --> 00:05:00,768 Hang on, hang on.
- 00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:03,139 My worshipers expect an entrance.
- 00:05:04,943 --> 00:05:06,680 Ooh!
- 00:05:06,814 --> 00:05:09,653 Worshiper 1: Oh, I know that one! That's a kingfisher.
- 00:05:09,820 --> 00:05:12,190 Worshiper 2: Ooh, hooded crow! Worshiper 1: Red-backed shrike!
- 00:05:12,191 --> 00:05:14,261 Show the plumage! Show the plumage!
- 00:05:14,362 --> 00:05:16,265 Yeah!
- 00:05:16,399 --> 00:05:18,168 All hail Deliria!
- 00:05:18,169 --> 00:05:19,873 Thank you, thank you.
- 00:05:19,973 --> 00:05:21,275 It was hard. I'm amazing.
- 00:05:21,408 --> 00:05:23,146 Thank you. Mom, I'm impressed.
- 00:05:23,246 --> 00:05:24,683 Bird nerds are highly intelligent
- 00:05:24,783 --> 00:05:27,021 and socially inept, which makes them
- 00:05:27,154 --> 00:05:28,591 even smarter, in my opinion.
- 00:05:28,691 --> 00:05:30,227 All right, guys, move in.
- 00:05:30,360 --> 00:05:32,464 Be respectful of the losers if you can.
- 00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,702 Huh. Big, buff soldiers.
- 00:05:34,803 --> 00:05:36,272 Nerdy bird people.
- 00:05:36,372 --> 00:05:38,309 I can't remember. Did Ty come out as pro-
- 00:05:38,410 --> 00:05:39,746 or anti-selective breeding experiment?
- 00:05:39,847 --> 00:05:41,750 You remember things he says?
- 00:05:41,850 --> 00:05:43,955 If we cross-bred their intelligence
- 00:05:44,055 --> 00:05:46,425 with their muscles, we'd create a super-citizen
- 00:05:46,426 --> 00:05:48,096 that could fight and think.
- 00:05:48,196 --> 00:05:49,867 And also love birds, I guess.
- 00:05:49,967 --> 00:05:51,871 Interesting. Soldiers with lovers
- 00:05:51,971 --> 00:05:55,009 in the city are soldiers who don't desert the city.
- 00:05:55,010 --> 00:05:57,715 And if I had worshipers who were smart and beefy,
- 00:05:57,815 --> 00:06:00,622 guess whose hair I'd be in? Athena's?
- 00:06:00,755 --> 00:06:02,324 I told you to never say it!
- 00:06:02,457 --> 00:06:04,328 Angry bird exit!
- 00:06:04,461 --> 00:06:07,000 Majestic.
- 00:06:07,100 --> 00:06:09,171 Good citizens. I think I have something
- 00:06:09,305 --> 00:06:11,042 that will make dry season go a lot faster.
- 00:06:11,175 --> 00:06:13,680 What I'm wearing is called a mud suit. Very cooling.
- 00:06:13,681 --> 00:06:15,383 You think we haven't tried that?
- 00:06:15,484 --> 00:06:17,488 It dries, and then you're just dirty.
- 00:06:17,622 --> 00:06:20,060 Come on, King Ty! We want action!
- 00:06:22,532 --> 00:06:26,205 Who wants a pool?
- 00:06:30,313 --> 00:06:32,818 Cannonball! Ooh!
- 00:06:33,654 --> 00:06:36,492 My leg's a little broken, I think.
- 00:06:38,698 --> 00:06:39,999 I'll be damned.
- 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:41,736 The old Mantitaur was right.
- 00:06:41,737 --> 00:06:43,639 The whole city is in the pool.
- 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:45,176 Even Baby Charybdis is here.
- 00:06:45,276 --> 00:06:47,180 Baby Charybdis: Hey, Ty! Great pool!
- 00:06:47,280 --> 00:06:49,151 Hell yeah! I love this pool!
- 00:06:49,251 --> 00:06:50,588 Baby Charybdis: Aw!
- 00:06:50,688 --> 00:06:52,592 Hail Tyrannis! Hero of dry season!
- 00:06:52,692 --> 00:06:54,630 Oh, you guys.
- 00:06:54,730 --> 00:06:56,399 I just want everyone to have fun.
- 00:06:56,534 --> 00:06:58,402 Ah, Dad! I see you're having fun
- 00:06:58,503 --> 00:07:00,407 with the weather stick. Glad you've come around.
- 00:07:00,508 --> 00:07:02,746 Just remember: a little does go a long way.
- 00:07:02,846 --> 00:07:05,050 Right, yeah, sure. I do say this
- 00:07:05,183 --> 00:07:06,786 as an expert in indulgence.
- 00:07:06,953 --> 00:07:08,757 Indulgence, yes! What's this now?
- 00:07:08,890 --> 00:07:11,296 Uh, your grace? Fantastic job with the pool.
- 00:07:11,429 --> 00:07:13,065 No need to thank me for the pool.
- 00:07:13,165 --> 00:07:15,738 Seeing my citizens refreshed and grateful is enough.
- 00:07:15,838 --> 00:07:18,811 One little thing. My cows are dying of thirst.
- 00:07:18,911 --> 00:07:21,115 They're like my family. Who I milk.
- 00:07:21,216 --> 00:07:23,688 Oh, right. Well, I wouldn't be "the people's king"
- 00:07:23,821 --> 00:07:25,992 if I didn't help out your cow fam.
- 00:07:26,092 --> 00:07:27,394 What do you say
- 00:07:27,529 --> 00:07:30,200 to a world-class irrigation system?
- 00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:32,371 I can't thank you enough!
- 00:07:32,505 --> 00:07:34,341 Please, take one of my cow daughters.
- 00:07:34,475 --> 00:07:36,379 Do whatever with it! Oh, that's OK.
- 00:07:36,479 --> 00:07:38,584 Go on. I'm not having sex
- 00:07:38,684 --> 00:07:40,020 with a cow! Huh?
- 00:07:40,153 --> 00:07:42,290 What? Oh! Is that what you thought
- 00:07:42,391 --> 00:07:43,761 I was offering? No, no, no,
- 00:07:43,861 --> 00:07:45,598 of course not. Sex, with a cow? Who would--
- 00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:48,571 No, I was just mentioning, uh, that--in fact,
- 00:07:48,671 --> 00:07:50,808 you know what? I will take one of those cows.
- 00:07:50,941 --> 00:07:53,312 I don't think so. Right. Fair enough.
- 00:07:53,413 --> 00:07:55,785 OK, company! Time for mess!
- 00:07:55,885 --> 00:07:57,955 Seating arrangements are mandatory!
- 00:07:58,055 --> 00:07:59,760 I don't expect them to mate right away.
- 00:07:59,860 --> 00:08:02,230 As a male scientist, I estimate 10 to 15 minutes
- 00:08:02,330 --> 00:08:05,203 of light conversation before intercourse. Let's observe.
- 00:08:05,304 --> 00:08:07,942 Soldier 2: So you just believe everything you see on urns?
- 00:08:08,042 --> 00:08:09,979 Worshiper 2: You think what, the whole thing was faked?
- 00:08:10,079 --> 00:08:11,950 She didn't kill her kids? Soldier 2: You're the one
- 00:08:12,050 --> 00:08:14,589 listening to mainstream Medea! Yikes.
- 00:08:14,689 --> 00:08:16,792 Let's try another table. Soldier 3: I saw my best friend
- 00:08:16,793 --> 00:08:18,563 slaughtered at the Battle of Thebes.
- 00:08:18,663 --> 00:08:20,902 He was standing as close to me as you are right now.
- 00:08:21,002 --> 00:08:23,406 We were only boys. Worshiper 1: Uhh...
- 00:08:23,507 --> 00:08:25,945 are you gonna ask me anything about me?
- 00:08:26,078 --> 00:08:28,216 Maybe this is gonna be harder than we thought.
- 00:08:28,349 --> 00:08:30,386 Ahem! Ahem! Please note
- 00:08:30,487 --> 00:08:32,023 that persons having active leprosy,
- 00:08:32,123 --> 00:08:34,729 or who have had leprosy within the previous 14 days,
- 00:08:34,896 --> 00:08:36,867 shall not be allowed to enter the pool.
- 00:08:36,967 --> 00:08:39,472 Aw! My beloved king?
- 00:08:39,573 --> 00:08:41,242 We heard you're giving away water
- 00:08:41,342 --> 00:08:42,745 and, well, we'd love some
- 00:08:42,845 --> 00:08:45,784 for Krapopolis' orphanage. To bathe them and such.
- 00:08:45,918 --> 00:08:48,154 You had me at "my beloved king!"
- 00:08:49,792 --> 00:08:52,031 Shine up those motherless boys and girls!
- 00:08:52,131 --> 00:08:54,267 Oh, we use the girls for kindling,
- 00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:56,372 to heat the boys' baths. Thanks!
- 00:08:56,507 --> 00:08:57,876 Long live King Ty!
- 00:08:58,009 --> 00:09:00,615 King Ty? If you don't mind. Thank you.
- 00:09:00,715 --> 00:09:02,985 I was starting to think about what that woman just said.
- 00:09:03,119 --> 00:09:06,559 She wasn't saying that they burn the girls
- 00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:08,797 for kindling, was she?
- 00:09:08,897 --> 00:09:10,802 I've heard you're giving out water.
- 00:09:10,902 --> 00:09:12,572 Yes, thank you! Thank you again.
- 00:09:12,672 --> 00:09:14,843 Ooh, please, go ahead. I've kinda been debating
- 00:09:14,977 --> 00:09:16,780 adding a little pond to my property,
- 00:09:16,946 --> 00:09:18,917 maybe putting some fish in it? Say no more.
- 00:09:19,018 --> 00:09:21,355 Will this do?
- 00:09:23,125 --> 00:09:25,764 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! I mean, yeah,
- 00:09:25,864 --> 00:09:27,836 but I want to reiterate that I'm still
- 00:09:27,936 --> 00:09:29,938 in the "waffling" phase here.
- 00:09:29,939 --> 00:09:32,912 I guess, if I decide against the fish pond,
- 00:09:33,045 --> 00:09:34,916 I'll just dump this water into a gulch.
- 00:09:35,016 --> 00:09:36,653 Long as you're happy! Who's next?
- 00:09:36,753 --> 00:09:38,691 Well, hello, How can I help?
- 00:09:38,791 --> 00:09:40,561 Well, I have this cactus.
- 00:09:40,661 --> 00:09:42,197 The soil feels pretty moist, but--
- 00:09:42,297 --> 00:09:44,936 Better safe than succulent-less!
- 00:09:45,036 --> 00:09:46,873 Oh. Hmm.
- 00:09:46,973 --> 00:09:50,647 That's weird. Let me just...
- 00:09:51,984 --> 00:09:54,321 I'm not normally
- 00:09:54,421 --> 00:09:56,693 into someone with your leg shape, but would you
- 00:09:56,793 --> 00:09:59,196 ever want to "hang out"? Absolutely.
- 00:09:59,197 --> 00:10:01,335 Maybe you'd like to see the city's famous fountain show.
- 00:10:01,435 --> 00:10:04,742 You have a fountain show? We're about to!
- 00:10:04,843 --> 00:10:07,414 Nothing like a little game to get things going.
- 00:10:07,515 --> 00:10:09,485 Worshiper 1: OK, this is a tough one.
- 00:10:09,586 --> 00:10:11,422 What... uh... I--hmm.
- 00:10:11,557 --> 00:10:13,025 I don't know.
- 00:10:13,125 --> 00:10:15,898 Soldier 3: Odobenus the Great? How did we not get that?
- 00:10:15,998 --> 00:10:17,769 Worshiper 1: Am I supposed to know who that is?
- 00:10:17,869 --> 00:10:19,740 Soldier 3: He's the jolly walrus-man hybrid
- 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:21,776 who forges our armor! You could have given
- 00:10:21,777 --> 00:10:24,515 so many clue words! Walrus! Man! Forge!
- 00:10:24,516 --> 00:10:27,688 Knowing smile! Likes to rape! I don't get it.
- 00:10:27,689 --> 00:10:29,424 This icebreaker always works with mice.
- 00:10:29,525 --> 00:10:31,429 I don't think smart people and people who can
- 00:10:31,530 --> 00:10:33,834 do a one-handed pull-up are meant to talk to each other.
- 00:10:33,934 --> 00:10:36,406 How are my super-soldiers coming along?
- 00:10:36,507 --> 00:10:37,842 Not great yet.
- 00:10:38,009 --> 00:10:39,813 What an incredible surprise.
- 00:10:39,946 --> 00:10:42,017 Who would have guessed, when the soldiers can see all
- 00:10:42,117 --> 00:10:44,021 the worshipers' veins, and the worshipers can smell
- 00:10:44,155 --> 00:10:46,793 all the soldiers'... well, all the soldiers.
- 00:10:46,893 --> 00:10:48,931 Here.
- 00:10:49,031 --> 00:10:50,534 Hey!
- 00:10:50,635 --> 00:10:54,074 We're trying to create lasting emotional connections here!
- 00:10:54,174 --> 00:10:56,245 Worshiper 3: Hi, I'm Katie. My friends are annoying.
- 00:10:56,378 --> 00:10:58,482 Can I hang with you? Stand down, Hippo.
- 00:10:58,650 --> 00:11:00,019 But--come on! I was just--
- 00:11:00,152 --> 00:11:01,923 Worshiper 4: Hey, do you want to hear me talk about
- 00:11:02,023 --> 00:11:04,829 the Sardinian warbler for a really long time?
- 00:11:04,929 --> 00:11:06,767 Do I! Worshiper 4: So, starting
- 00:11:06,867 --> 00:11:08,737 with the plumage...
- 00:11:12,745 --> 00:11:14,649 Isn't instant gratification
- 00:11:14,749 --> 00:11:16,686 just so incredibly gratifying?
- 00:11:16,786 --> 00:11:18,757 I don't know why it took me so long.
- 00:11:18,857 --> 00:11:20,594 Hey, Ty-bone! Great pool.
- 00:11:20,694 --> 00:11:22,264 People are giving me nicknames!
- 00:11:22,397 --> 00:11:23,600 You mean new nicknames.
- 00:11:23,700 --> 00:11:25,069 What was my previous nickname?
- 00:11:25,169 --> 00:11:26,807 Ha ha! We don't have to get into that.
- 00:11:26,907 --> 00:11:28,510 See, before, they felt they couldn't get
- 00:11:28,644 --> 00:11:30,179 too close to me. They were too concerned
- 00:11:30,279 --> 00:11:32,851 about the decorum between a king and his subjects.
- 00:11:32,951 --> 00:11:34,287 Let's say that's it, yes.
- 00:11:34,387 --> 00:11:36,392 But now, look at this. Miriam, up top.
- 00:11:36,492 --> 00:11:38,195 Looking good, Not-Dork.
- 00:11:38,295 --> 00:11:39,898 Hey, can you wet down my sandals?
- 00:11:39,899 --> 00:11:42,505 They just look better with a little sheen.
- 00:11:42,605 --> 00:11:44,175 Sure thing.
- 00:11:44,308 --> 00:11:46,212 Son, might you be overdoing it a little?
- 00:11:46,312 --> 00:11:48,115 Whaaat? Now who's the uptight one?
- 00:11:48,249 --> 00:11:50,787 Grab yourself a Ty Colada and start your next nap right there.
- 00:11:50,921 --> 00:11:52,792 Hey, you guys want to see my pee stream?
- 00:11:52,892 --> 00:11:55,396 Oh, Joshua, we really don't need to see that--
- 00:11:55,496 --> 00:11:57,267 That is quite robust.
- 00:11:57,367 --> 00:12:00,173 OK, this is crazy.
- 00:12:00,273 --> 00:12:02,712 Some of the soldiers who deserted heard about this
- 00:12:02,812 --> 00:12:04,481 and came back, with more soldiers!
- 00:12:04,582 --> 00:12:06,886 And everyone's humping! Something about
- 00:12:06,986 --> 00:12:09,324 the music and the darkness and the alcohol.
- 00:12:09,325 --> 00:12:11,127 We've created an atmosphere
- 00:12:11,128 --> 00:12:13,266 of artificial sexual arousal!
- 00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:16,272 No one can hear anything anyone is saying!
- 00:12:16,405 --> 00:12:18,710 And they're loving it!
- 00:12:18,810 --> 00:12:21,081 I'm gonna live forever!
- 00:12:21,215 --> 00:12:24,821 It's a feeling I'm having right now due to the intensity
- 00:12:24,822 --> 00:12:27,393 of the atmosphere! What?
- 00:12:27,493 --> 00:12:29,030 Oh, hey, Kolax, there's probably gonna be
- 00:12:29,130 --> 00:12:31,035 a lot of citizens who want to talk to me today.
- 00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:33,072 Oh, no doubt, boss. I'll keep 'em away.
- 00:12:33,205 --> 00:12:35,476 No one gets close. That's the rule, right?
- 00:12:35,611 --> 00:12:36,913 No, no, that's the thing.
- 00:12:37,013 --> 00:12:38,416 Ordinarily I would need protection,
- 00:12:38,517 --> 00:12:40,152 but I want to mingle with the citizens now.
- 00:12:40,253 --> 00:12:41,824 I can't let you. It's too risky.
- 00:12:41,924 --> 00:12:43,727 We're living in a new era, Kolax.
- 00:12:43,827 --> 00:12:45,798 One where people like their king.
- 00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:47,534 I'm parched. Anyone want water?
- 00:12:47,668 --> 00:12:51,108 Yesterday I got this thing to do both flat and bubbly.
- 00:12:51,208 --> 00:12:52,444 Ahem.
- 00:12:52,578 --> 00:12:54,982 Damn. What is wrong with this thing?
- 00:12:55,082 --> 00:12:56,418 I've never seen it do that before.
- 00:12:56,552 --> 00:12:58,757 You may have overused it. Overused it?
- 00:12:58,890 --> 00:13:00,159 You can't overuse it.
- 00:13:00,259 --> 00:13:02,163 Can you overuse it? I don't know.
- 00:13:02,263 --> 00:13:03,901 Well, how do you fix it?
- 00:13:04,001 --> 00:13:05,604 I don't know that, either.
- 00:13:05,704 --> 00:13:07,073 I've never been in this situation before.
- 00:13:07,173 --> 00:13:08,810 Well, we've got to get it working.
- 00:13:08,811 --> 00:13:10,313 I'm in a really good place right now.
- 00:13:10,447 --> 00:13:11,950 I've got citizens loving me, cows winking at me.
- 00:13:12,050 --> 00:13:13,419 I need to keep this going. King,
- 00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:15,791 we've got a problem. The Placeans are here.
- 00:13:15,891 --> 00:13:17,226 Oh, your friends who gave us the stick.
- 00:13:17,327 --> 00:13:18,763 Maybe they can fix it. Yeah, no.
- 00:13:18,897 --> 00:13:20,332 They're attacking. Attacking?
- 00:13:20,432 --> 00:13:24,473 Chief Ravdi: I am Chief Ravdi, of the Placean people!
- 00:13:24,474 --> 00:13:25,844 Ravdi, old friend!
- 00:13:25,978 --> 00:13:27,815 Chief Ravdi: Don't "old friend" me, Shlub!
- 00:13:27,948 --> 00:13:30,854 You stole our weather stick! You stole it?!
- 00:13:30,954 --> 00:13:33,025 Chief Ravdi: Open your gates or your whole city
- 00:13:33,125 --> 00:13:35,430 will pay the price! Should we open the gates?
- 00:13:35,598 --> 00:13:37,267 It doesn't really seem like that's the best course
- 00:13:37,367 --> 00:13:39,036 of action, Scott, now, does it?! I don't know!
- 00:13:39,037 --> 00:13:40,641 I just work here! Dad, fill me in.
- 00:13:40,741 --> 00:13:43,045 What have you not told me? Ravdi's a good fellow.
- 00:13:43,145 --> 00:13:45,884 This has to be a simple misunderstanding.
- 00:13:45,885 --> 00:13:48,055 Chief Ravdi: Fire!
- 00:13:49,290 --> 00:13:52,965 Maybe a misunderstanding on my part. Ha ha!
- 00:13:55,270 --> 00:13:56,137 There's no need for violence!
- 00:13:56,138 --> 00:13:58,307 I'm sure this is all just a silly mix-up.
- 00:13:58,308 --> 00:14:00,213 Can we say that? Can we pretend that's what it is?
- 00:14:00,313 --> 00:14:02,919 Chief Ravdi: The silly mix-up was me allowing this thief
- 00:14:03,052 --> 00:14:05,357 to participate in our Friendship Festival!
- 00:14:05,457 --> 00:14:08,295 Did those trust falls mean nothing to you?
- 00:14:08,296 --> 00:14:09,999 Dad, you told me you got the weather stick
- 00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:11,535 from your friends. They are my friends,
- 00:14:11,536 --> 00:14:13,238 and I did get it. But he's saying
- 00:14:13,239 --> 00:14:15,443 you stole it! Stealing is a--hmm,
- 00:14:15,610 --> 00:14:17,882 it's a kind of getting, but I didn't steal anything.
- 00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:20,353 I simply abided by the rules of finders keepers.
- 00:14:20,486 --> 00:14:22,223 Finders keepers? Yes, if you find
- 00:14:22,323 --> 00:14:24,963 something--here's the best bit-- you get to keep it.
- 00:14:25,063 --> 00:14:26,967 I guess when I said they gave it to me, I meant
- 00:14:27,067 --> 00:14:29,071 they gave it to me in a holistic sense,
- 00:14:29,171 --> 00:14:31,175 by leaving it somewhere where I could find it.
- 00:14:31,341 --> 00:14:33,613 Mm! Look, my dad is a silly old man,
- 00:14:33,714 --> 00:14:35,617 and I promise we can make this right.
- 00:14:35,718 --> 00:14:37,387 Chief Ravdi: Lightning! Ow!
- 00:14:37,487 --> 00:14:38,890 You have other sticks?
- 00:14:38,990 --> 00:14:40,460 Chief Ravdi: You better believe we have other sticks!
- 00:14:40,561 --> 00:14:42,430 They're a stick-based culture, which is why
- 00:14:42,531 --> 00:14:45,103 they shouldn't mind losing one. Chief Ravdi: Biting flies!
- 00:14:45,203 --> 00:14:47,073 Ow! Ow! Damn you!
- 00:14:47,173 --> 00:14:48,544 Please, I see that we made a mistake,
- 00:14:48,644 --> 00:14:50,781 and I'd love to make this right. Why don't you stay
- 00:14:50,914 --> 00:14:53,018 and enjoy our many waterfalls and lazy rivers?
- 00:14:53,118 --> 00:14:54,454 Chief Ravdi: You don't get it!
- 00:14:54,555 --> 00:14:56,225 Or perhaps you'd like to experience
- 00:14:56,325 --> 00:14:57,895 our world-famous slip-then-slide?
- 00:14:57,996 --> 00:14:59,364 It turns accidents into fun-ccidents.
- 00:14:59,498 --> 00:15:01,100 If we just get this thing working again,
- 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,540 I promise there's enough water for everyone.
- 00:15:03,706 --> 00:15:05,042 Chief Ravdi: Only there isn't!
- 00:15:05,143 --> 00:15:06,746 The weather stick doesn't make water.
- 00:15:06,846 --> 00:15:08,783 It simply moves it from place to place.
- 00:15:08,883 --> 00:15:11,556 So not only did you steal our stick,
- 00:15:11,656 --> 00:15:13,292 you stole our lifeblood.
- 00:15:13,392 --> 00:15:16,499 Our livestock. Our live... crops.
- 00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:20,005 Our vegetables! Everything!
- 00:15:20,841 --> 00:15:22,177 Hello.
- 00:15:22,277 --> 00:15:24,214 Did you know about this? Who's to say?
- 00:15:24,314 --> 00:15:26,151 I've heard a lot of things over the years.
- 00:15:26,251 --> 00:15:29,158 They don't always stay with me. Besides, I just gave you access
- 00:15:29,291 --> 00:15:31,162 to the stick, I didn't tell you to drain the world!
- 00:15:31,295 --> 00:15:34,400 Chief Ravdi: Dust in your eyes! Ow! Stop it!
- 00:15:34,502 --> 00:15:36,304 Chief Ravdi, we needed water.
- 00:15:36,404 --> 00:15:38,476 My father saw that I was in need, and while he should not
- 00:15:38,610 --> 00:15:40,747 have taken your weather stick in the first place,
- 00:15:40,881 --> 00:15:42,752 surely you see that he was simply trying
- 00:15:42,885 --> 00:15:44,755 to help out his son in an emergency.
- 00:15:44,889 --> 00:15:46,458 Chief Ravdi: It was no emergency!
- 00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:48,362 You're running a sexy chariot wash!
- 00:15:48,496 --> 00:15:50,232 OK,
- 00:15:50,332 --> 00:15:52,237 it did get a little out of hand. Chief Ravdi: Sunburn!
- 00:15:52,370 --> 00:15:54,107 Ow! If using the water stick meant we were
- 00:15:54,207 --> 00:15:56,145 taking water from someplace else, aren't you giving me
- 00:15:56,278 --> 00:15:58,115 somebody else's sunburn? Chief Ravdi: Somehow,
- 00:15:58,249 --> 00:16:00,319 I don't think they're going to complain! Sleet!
- 00:16:00,453 --> 00:16:02,858 Ah! How many sticks do you guys have?
- 00:16:02,958 --> 00:16:04,662 Chief Ravdi: Lots! What do I have
- 00:16:04,762 --> 00:16:06,098 to do to make it right?
- 00:16:06,198 --> 00:16:07,568 Chief Ravdi: Give us the water back.
- 00:16:07,702 --> 00:16:09,437 All of it? Chief Ravdi: Yes, all of it!
- 00:16:09,538 --> 00:16:11,743 OK, just let me think. Ahem. Dad, you know these guys.
- 00:16:11,843 --> 00:16:13,244 What kind of damage can they do?
- 00:16:13,245 --> 00:16:14,949 Just kind of this relatively topical stuff?
- 00:16:15,049 --> 00:16:16,418 I don't know. I'm not a stick man.
- 00:16:16,552 --> 00:16:18,188 I'm more of a finders-keepers man.
- 00:16:18,189 --> 00:16:19,792 Of course you don't know.
- 00:16:19,892 --> 00:16:22,497 It seems like the worst they can do right now is biting flies.
- 00:16:22,632 --> 00:16:25,538 I'll just take my chances.
- 00:16:27,006 --> 00:16:29,177 Ravdi, you old bastard,
- 00:16:29,277 --> 00:16:32,183 you've built a bigger stick, haven't you?
- 00:16:32,283 --> 00:16:34,187 This is probably a stupid question,
- 00:16:34,287 --> 00:16:36,224 but where the hell are Mom and the army?!
- 00:16:36,358 --> 00:16:38,563 It's still so hot. And there's no moisture
- 00:16:38,663 --> 00:16:41,435 left in my body. Gimme some of your helmet water.
- 00:16:41,536 --> 00:16:43,338 Get off! I'm already flaking!
- 00:16:43,472 --> 00:16:45,511 Soldier 4: That was great. Soldier 2: Yeah, last night,
- 00:16:45,611 --> 00:16:48,315 I drank wine till I was disoriented and unable
- 00:16:48,416 --> 00:16:50,554 to perform sexually. I feel ill today.
- 00:16:50,654 --> 00:16:52,592 Let's do it again tonight! Weren't you one
- 00:16:52,692 --> 00:16:54,895 of the deserters trying to leave Krapopolis?
- 00:16:55,029 --> 00:16:56,464 Soldier 4: Yeah. Changed my mind, I guess.
- 00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:59,238 Turns out if I drink enough and dance around at night,
- 00:16:59,338 --> 00:17:02,175 I forget my life during the day is miserable.
- 00:17:02,176 --> 00:17:04,481 So people will stay in the most disgusting,
- 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:07,220 awful city if it has some kind of "night life."
- 00:17:07,353 --> 00:17:09,224 We need a name for this principle.
- 00:17:09,358 --> 00:17:11,228 Oh! What'd you say your name was?
- 00:17:11,362 --> 00:17:13,065 Soldier 4: Miami. Ehh...
- 00:17:13,165 --> 00:17:14,836 Technically I should beat these deserters.
- 00:17:14,936 --> 00:17:18,042 But maybe letting them have fun is better than clubbing them?
- 00:17:18,142 --> 00:17:20,514 That's what we call it: "deserting"!
- 00:17:20,614 --> 00:17:23,485 No! "Clubbing." Hey, Mom. You're up.
- 00:17:23,586 --> 00:17:25,624 Anybody pregnant in there? I don't think so.
- 00:17:25,724 --> 00:17:28,630 Most of your troops had too much wine to raise the flag,
- 00:17:28,763 --> 00:17:31,367 if you know what I mean. Ohh, right.
- 00:17:31,368 --> 00:17:34,339 I think I know what you mean. Well, it didn't help that
- 00:17:34,340 --> 00:17:37,380 your worshipers spent half the night in the bathroom crying.
- 00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:39,384 Katie was going through some stuff.
- 00:17:39,519 --> 00:17:41,154 You know, I think we should do this again.
- 00:17:41,255 --> 00:17:42,992 Or at least, roughly every seven days.
- 00:17:43,092 --> 00:17:45,430 We can call it "Septimal Night Veneration."
- 00:17:45,531 --> 00:17:47,167 We're already calling it "clubbing."
- 00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:48,937 Well, we'll see what catches on first.
- 00:17:49,037 --> 00:17:51,174 So that's probably some sort of doomsday stick,
- 00:17:51,275 --> 00:17:53,145 right? I had no idea they have
- 00:17:53,245 --> 00:17:54,682 this kind of power. I should have known
- 00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:56,552 there would be crazy consequences if I used
- 00:17:56,686 --> 00:17:58,590 something from your magic box. Yes, you should have,
- 00:17:58,690 --> 00:18:00,728 and I did warn you. We have two options.
- 00:18:00,828 --> 00:18:03,332 Option one is we all die. Option two is I give them back
- 00:18:03,432 --> 00:18:05,302 their water, and people don't like me.
- 00:18:05,436 --> 00:18:07,007 I think it should be fairly obvious, son.
- 00:18:07,140 --> 00:18:08,677 Yeah, easy for you to say.
- 00:18:08,777 --> 00:18:10,613 People have always liked you. But now the Placeans are going
- 00:18:10,714 --> 00:18:13,218 to do whatever that stick does, and the tickle trolls aren't
- 00:18:13,318 --> 00:18:15,256 even here, so I'm starting to think they were just
- 00:18:15,356 --> 00:18:17,260 something you and Mom made up to mess with me!
- 00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:18,930 Well, that's on you for being thirty
- 00:18:19,064 --> 00:18:20,801 and still believing in tickle trolls.
- 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:23,773 But I believe I owe you an apology.
- 00:18:24,776 --> 00:18:26,278 Any more to that?
- 00:18:26,378 --> 00:18:28,015 Oh, I haven't done this in a while.
- 00:18:28,115 --> 00:18:30,887 I thought that would be enough. What's called for, specifics?
- 00:18:30,988 --> 00:18:32,958 You're actually asking? Yes!
- 00:18:33,058 --> 00:18:34,528 All right, all right. Um...
- 00:18:34,628 --> 00:18:37,568 I just hated seeing you being unhappy and unliked, son.
- 00:18:37,668 --> 00:18:40,574 But as your dad, I should get used to that.
- 00:18:40,674 --> 00:18:43,345 No? More? Is that enough? It'll do.
- 00:18:43,445 --> 00:18:45,651 And, as a leader, in the future, I should resist
- 00:18:45,751 --> 00:18:47,654 overpromising and immediate gratification.
- 00:18:47,754 --> 00:18:49,892 True leadership lies in under-promising,
- 00:18:49,992 --> 00:18:51,663 overdelivering, and slow progress.
- 00:18:51,763 --> 00:18:53,699 Ha! It's a whole back and forth!
- 00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:55,102 We're both apologizing!
- 00:18:55,236 --> 00:18:57,207 What fun we're having! Ah, ha ha ha ha!
- 00:18:57,340 --> 00:19:00,213 Yes. You know, we have done this before.
- 00:19:00,313 --> 00:19:03,251 Well, son, even if this whole town turns on you--
- 00:19:03,252 --> 00:19:05,223 and they will-- I'll still love you.
- 00:19:05,323 --> 00:19:07,225 Thanks, Dad. I guess no matter what,
- 00:19:07,226 --> 00:19:08,997 they will never be satisfied, and that's something
- 00:19:09,097 --> 00:19:10,466 I have to be OK with as king.
- 00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:12,772 I think I know what I have to do.
- 00:19:12,905 --> 00:19:15,243 Everybody out of the pool. Swim time is over.
- 00:19:15,343 --> 00:19:16,879 Boo!
- 00:19:17,013 --> 00:19:19,685 I'm not getting out till my toes are all wrinkly!
- 00:19:19,785 --> 00:19:21,656 This water you're all enjoying,
- 00:19:21,756 --> 00:19:23,425 and that's making you all love me, was stolen.
- 00:19:23,526 --> 00:19:25,096 So I'm afraid it must be returned.
- 00:19:25,229 --> 00:19:27,166 Boo! Yes,
- 00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:29,537 you can hate me if you want. We do!
- 00:19:29,538 --> 00:19:32,544 And I accept that.
- 00:19:32,645 --> 00:19:35,550 Or I will someday.
- 00:19:42,664 --> 00:19:44,100 Oof. Oww!
- 00:19:44,234 --> 00:19:45,771 Huh?
- 00:19:45,871 --> 00:19:47,575 Oh!
- 00:19:47,675 --> 00:19:49,645 Man 2: Oh--oof!
- 00:19:51,749 --> 00:19:53,653 There you go. Chief Ravdi: And the stick?
- 00:19:53,753 --> 00:19:56,224 What? I can't sneak anything past you guys.
- 00:19:56,325 --> 00:19:58,195 Are we good now? Chief Ravdi: We're good.
- 00:19:58,295 --> 00:20:02,538 Now you know never to mess with the Placeans.
- 00:20:02,705 --> 00:20:04,241 Ha ha ha ha! Man!
- 00:20:04,374 --> 00:20:07,648 That huge decoy stick works every time.
- 00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:09,652 Well, now that everyone hates me,
- 00:20:09,752 --> 00:20:12,356 I might as well drown my sorrows in an orgy.
- 00:20:12,456 --> 00:20:14,059 No, no. I have something else
- 00:20:14,060 --> 00:20:16,498 in my magic box for you. It's a hug.
- 00:20:16,633 --> 00:20:18,134 But what about the orgy lamp?
- 00:20:18,135 --> 00:20:21,407 Haven't you learned anything? That's just for me.
- 00:20:24,314 --> 00:20:26,986 Tickle troll leader: Ah, another delicious meal
- 00:20:27,086 --> 00:20:28,355 under another perfect moon.
- 00:20:28,455 --> 00:20:31,562 A tickle troll giggle for this beautiful day!
- 00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:35,771 What's this? What's happening?
- 00:20:35,871 --> 00:20:38,040 Tickle troll shaman: I knew this day would come.
- 00:20:38,041 --> 00:20:39,745 It is prophesied.
- 00:20:39,845 --> 00:20:43,018 For millennia, we tickle trolls lived in harmony with humans.
- 00:20:43,118 --> 00:20:44,755 We visited them in their sleep,
- 00:20:44,855 --> 00:20:47,493 and they rewarded us with their delicious laughter.
- 00:20:47,594 --> 00:20:50,701 Heh! But then, parents started using us as a threat.
- 00:20:50,801 --> 00:20:52,704 "Beware the tickle trolls," they said.
- 00:20:52,804 --> 00:20:55,242 "Their name is a fake-out," they said.
- 00:20:55,342 --> 00:20:58,082 "Brush your teeth or the tickle trolls will get you!"
- 00:20:58,182 --> 00:21:01,087 "Don't wet your bed or the tickle trolls will get you."
- 00:21:01,221 --> 00:21:03,660 Heh! No longer did the children bless us with their laughter.
- 00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:06,264 They screamed at the sight of us!
- 00:21:06,364 --> 00:21:08,035 So we stopped tickling them.
- 00:21:08,135 --> 00:21:09,738 Generations of kids grew up
- 00:21:09,838 --> 00:21:11,207 never even seeing us!
- 00:21:11,208 --> 00:21:13,010 They believed they had been tricked.
- 00:21:13,011 --> 00:21:16,385 And just as foretold by our sacred oral tradition,
- 00:21:16,485 --> 00:21:19,123 when the last little boy stopped believing in us,
- 00:21:19,223 --> 00:21:21,563 we would disappear.
- 00:21:21,663 --> 00:21:23,567 Tickle troll leader: Wait. You knew this day
- 00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,736 would come, but you never told us?
- 00:21:25,737 --> 00:21:27,440 Tickle troll shaman: It never came up.
- 00:21:27,541 --> 00:21:30,781 Tickle troll: We have an oral tradition?
- 00:21:30,981 --> 00:21:32,684 Did you get any of that?
- 00:21:34,722 --> 00:21:36,424 Bento.
- 00:00:02,906 --> 00:00:04,542 [Bird of prey shrieks]
- 00:00:04,543 --> 00:00:06,246 Tyrannis: Thank you all for coming out.
- 00:00:06,346 --> 00:00:08,718 I know dry season has been hard on all of us.
- 00:00:08,851 --> 00:00:09,953 Brutus: When is this gonna be over?
- 00:00:10,087 --> 00:00:11,657 Miriam: I'm tired of drinking sand.
- 00:00:11,824 --> 00:00:15,030 Joshua: My pee stream is like half of what it used to be.
- 00:00:15,130 --> 00:00:17,034 Tyrannis: I get it. We all hate dry season.
- 00:00:17,167 --> 00:00:19,038 But there are benefits. Dry season drives
- 00:00:19,138 --> 00:00:21,241 the tickle trolls north, far away from here.
- 00:00:21,242 --> 00:00:23,515 Brutus: What's so bad about the tickle trolls? They sound fun.
- 00:00:23,648 --> 00:00:25,284 Tyrannis: Trust me, they gave themselves that name
- 00:00:25,384 --> 00:00:27,221 to lure you in. They are ruthless!
- 00:00:27,321 --> 00:00:29,225 But we'll get through this, and as we all know,
- 00:00:29,325 --> 00:00:31,295 surviving hardship together is what creates a sense
- 00:00:31,462 --> 00:00:32,933 of community. Brutus: Does it?
- 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,639 Tyrannis: Yes, sometimes! So, to help us all get through it,
- 00:00:35,739 --> 00:00:38,243 I've organized Dry Fest. We're making it fun,
- 00:00:38,376 --> 00:00:40,314 like we did with swarming locust season.
- 00:00:40,414 --> 00:00:42,318 Joshua: No one enjoyed Locust Fest.
- 00:00:42,451 --> 00:00:43,788 Tyrannis: I seem to remember you
- 00:00:43,888 --> 00:00:45,191 winning the locust-eating contest.
- 00:00:45,324 --> 00:00:48,029 Joshua: They flew into my mouth when I yawned.
- 00:00:48,163 --> 00:00:49,298 Tyrannis: Are you gonna give your medal back?
- 00:00:49,398 --> 00:00:50,935 Joshua: Let's not go crazy.
- 00:00:51,036 --> 00:00:52,438 Tyrannis: OK, then. We've got a lot
- 00:00:52,573 --> 00:00:54,341 of fun dry-season activities planned.
- 00:00:54,342 --> 00:00:56,212 Later on, we'll have a slam poetry contest
- 00:00:56,346 --> 00:00:58,116 called "What I Hate About Dry Season!"
- 00:00:58,216 --> 00:00:59,586 Woman: This sucks! Man: Yeah!
- 00:00:59,753 --> 00:01:01,455 Man 2: Window dressing at best! Tyrannis: I'm sorry.
- 00:01:01,590 --> 00:01:03,260 What do you want me to do? Brutus: Fix my melted house!
- 00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:04,963 Joshua: Strengthen my pee stream!
- 00:01:05,097 --> 00:01:07,167 Miriam: Can you just make it less dry?
- 00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:08,637 Tyrannis: Are you seriously criticizing me
- 00:01:08,737 --> 00:01:11,075 for the weather now? Miriam: Hey, you signed up
- 00:01:11,076 --> 00:01:13,045 for this when you called yourself king.
- 00:01:13,046 --> 00:01:14,549 Brutus: I see this as more of a referendum
- 00:01:14,649 --> 00:01:16,252 on his leadership in general. [Citizens shout]
- 00:01:16,352 --> 00:01:18,156 Scott, slam poetry style: Season's too dry,
- 00:01:18,256 --> 00:01:20,193 dust in my eye! Pee stream's light
- 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:21,697 and I blame King Ty!
- 00:01:21,797 --> 00:01:25,036 It's more of a referendum on his leadership in general.
- 00:01:25,136 --> 00:01:27,976 Woman: Whoo-hoo! Yeah!
- 00:01:28,076 --> 00:01:29,980 Tyrannis: Slam poetry's canceled!
- 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:32,317 [Theme music playing]
- 00:01:32,418 --> 00:01:41,035 ♪
- 00:01:41,135 --> 00:01:43,306 [Male singers chanting]
- 00:01:43,407 --> 00:01:50,989 ♪
- 00:01:51,089 --> 00:01:53,393 Singers: Whoo!
- 00:01:55,531 --> 00:01:57,468 Tyrannis: It was one thing when they blamed me
- 00:01:57,569 --> 00:01:59,138 for the grain shortage. That's on me
- 00:01:59,239 --> 00:02:00,740 for storing the grain in the pig pen.
- 00:02:00,741 --> 00:02:02,746 And I'll take the hit for the pig obesity problem, too.
- 00:02:02,846 --> 00:02:04,648 But the citizens are being unreasonable here.
- 00:02:04,649 --> 00:02:07,922 Shlub: I'd say you've got yourself a popularity problem.
- 00:02:08,056 --> 00:02:10,492 Stupendous: I got a problem. My soldiers keep deserting
- 00:02:10,493 --> 00:02:13,166 because of the heat, and the punishment for deserters
- 00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:14,536 is I gotta club 'em.
- 00:02:14,636 --> 00:02:16,473 Which wastes my arm for like a day and a half.
- 00:02:16,574 --> 00:02:19,144 Isn't there a place my soldiers could cool off?
- 00:02:19,278 --> 00:02:20,849 Tyrannis: OK, this is one I can solve.
- 00:02:20,982 --> 00:02:22,351 Mom, your temple is nice and cool.
- 00:02:22,451 --> 00:02:24,154 Could Stupe's soldiers use that as their barracks?
- 00:02:24,288 --> 00:02:27,193 Deliria: Absolutely not! My temple is for my worshipers.
- 00:02:27,194 --> 00:02:28,963 Tyrannis: Aren't you overstating the number of worshipers
- 00:02:28,964 --> 00:02:31,236 you have by making it plural? Deliria: For your information,
- 00:02:31,336 --> 00:02:33,240 I have picked up a small contingent
- 00:02:33,340 --> 00:02:35,243 of very dedicated worshipers, who love
- 00:02:35,343 --> 00:02:37,114 watching me turn into various birds.
- 00:02:37,214 --> 00:02:38,783 Hippocampus: Bird watchers? Deliria: Yes!
- 00:02:38,784 --> 00:02:40,688 Tyrannis: Stupe, just convert your soldiers to Mom worshipers.
- 00:02:40,789 --> 00:02:43,460 Stupendous: That won't fly. You know who soldiers worship.
- 00:02:43,561 --> 00:02:45,998 I can't say her name. Deliria: You can say it.
- 00:02:46,099 --> 00:02:48,436 I have no problem hearing her name.
- 00:02:48,571 --> 00:02:51,309 Stupendous: Athena. Deliria: Never say her name!
- 00:02:51,409 --> 00:02:53,179 That was a test and you failed.
- 00:02:53,313 --> 00:02:55,217 Hippocampus: Ty, I'm working on something that can cool
- 00:02:55,317 --> 00:02:57,689 everyone down. It's called air conditioning.
- 00:02:57,789 --> 00:02:59,425 Tyrannis: How does it work? Hippocampus: No idea,
- 00:02:59,526 --> 00:03:01,262 I only have the name so far. Tyrannis: Well,
- 00:03:01,362 --> 00:03:03,298 in the meantime, can you just make the citizens heartier
- 00:03:03,299 --> 00:03:05,370 and not such crybabies? Hippocampus: Are we talking
- 00:03:05,470 --> 00:03:07,809 about... selective breeding?
- 00:03:07,909 --> 00:03:10,080 Cuz just say the word. I'll start the program.
- 00:03:10,180 --> 00:03:11,517 I'm itching to do it with humans.
- 00:03:11,651 --> 00:03:13,286 Tyrannis: No! No selective breeding.
- 00:03:13,386 --> 00:03:15,357 People should be free to choose their life partners
- 00:03:15,457 --> 00:03:17,328 through the tried and true system
- 00:03:17,428 --> 00:03:19,165 of arranged marriages and brides for land.
- 00:03:19,265 --> 00:03:20,767 Stupendous: Mom, can we please use your temple?
- 00:03:20,768 --> 00:03:22,605 Deliria: As long as no one says that name.
- 00:03:22,705 --> 00:03:24,208 Stupendous: Great. I'll get started.
- 00:03:24,308 --> 00:03:25,978 There's gonna be plenty of room if we rip out
- 00:03:26,078 --> 00:03:27,247 a few friezes and parapets.
- 00:03:27,381 --> 00:03:28,651 Deliria: Don't touch my parapets!
- 00:03:28,751 --> 00:03:30,654 Shlub: Son, I really hate to see you so down.
- 00:03:30,755 --> 00:03:33,226 I think I know what you need to do.
- 00:03:33,326 --> 00:03:35,197 Tyrannis: Yes, just accept that there are times
- 00:03:35,297 --> 00:03:37,234 in a king's reign when he isn't universally beloved.
- 00:03:37,334 --> 00:03:39,238 Shlub: I was going to say cheat. Tyrannis: Cheat?
- 00:03:39,372 --> 00:03:41,610 Shlub: Let me show you something.
- 00:03:41,710 --> 00:03:44,182 It's in here somewhere. Tyrannis: What is this stuff?
- 00:03:44,282 --> 00:03:46,218 Shlub: I've been alive for thousands of years.
- 00:03:46,318 --> 00:03:48,255 I've collected a few magic items in that time.
- 00:03:48,256 --> 00:03:50,728 Tyrannis: Oh, is this a genie in a lamp?
- 00:03:50,828 --> 00:03:53,198 Shlub: Not quite. It's an orgy in a lamp.
- 00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:54,902 Be careful with it.
- 00:03:54,903 --> 00:03:56,840 Woman, robocall voice: Good morning, Master.
- 00:03:56,940 --> 00:03:59,478 You have one orgy left.
- 00:03:59,579 --> 00:04:00,948 Shlub: Nope, false alarm.
- 00:04:01,048 --> 00:04:02,753 I'm saving you for a special occasion.
- 00:04:02,853 --> 00:04:04,989 [Lamp squeaks]
- 00:04:07,060 --> 00:04:08,363 Ah, here it is.
- 00:04:08,463 --> 00:04:10,367 This is a weather stick. You can control
- 00:04:10,467 --> 00:04:12,337 the elements with it. [Whooshing]
- 00:04:12,438 --> 00:04:14,508 Tyrannis: Whoa! Where did you get this?
- 00:04:14,509 --> 00:04:17,180 Shlub: I got it from my friends, the Placeans.
- 00:04:17,280 --> 00:04:20,020 It's quite flexible if you know how to use it.
- 00:04:20,153 --> 00:04:22,124 [Thunder]
- 00:04:22,224 --> 00:04:24,261 Now, you and I both know you have a hard time
- 00:04:24,395 --> 00:04:26,298 getting people to like you. Tyrannis: Of course.
- 00:04:26,299 --> 00:04:28,236 Because I'm an authority figure. Shlub: Sure,
- 00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:30,240 let's say it's that. But in my thousands of years
- 00:04:30,340 --> 00:04:32,645 on this earth, one thing has always been true:
- 00:04:32,779 --> 00:04:34,783 everyone loves you if you have a pool.
- 00:04:34,883 --> 00:04:36,753 Tyrannis: That is true. But I'm not going to cheat
- 00:04:36,854 --> 00:04:40,059 just to get people to love me. Dry season serves a purpose.
- 00:04:40,060 --> 00:04:41,530 It drives the tickle trolls north.
- 00:04:41,630 --> 00:04:43,667 Also, surviving hardships together is what creates
- 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:46,206 a sense of community is what I'm telling them.
- 00:04:46,306 --> 00:04:48,243 Shlub: Suit yourself. If you'll excuse me,
- 00:04:48,376 --> 00:04:50,346 it's nap time. If Daddy doesn't nap,
- 00:04:50,447 --> 00:04:53,419 Daddy gets cranky.
- 00:04:53,554 --> 00:04:55,490 Hippocampus: Ugh, this heat is unbearable.
- 00:04:55,592 --> 00:04:57,427 Look at my bowl. I've got an algae bloom!
- 00:04:57,562 --> 00:04:59,532 Stupendous: All right, guys, this is your new barracks.
- 00:04:59,666 --> 00:05:00,768 Deliria: Hang on, hang on.
- 00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:03,139 My worshipers expect an entrance.
- 00:05:03,273 --> 00:05:04,843 [Bird shrieks]
- 00:05:04,943 --> 00:05:06,680 Worshipers: Ooh!
- 00:05:06,814 --> 00:05:09,653 Worshiper 1: Oh, I know that one! That's a kingfisher.
- 00:05:09,820 --> 00:05:12,190 Worshiper 2: Ooh, hooded crow! Worshiper 1: Red-backed shrike!
- 00:05:12,191 --> 00:05:14,261 Show the plumage! Show the plumage!
- 00:05:14,362 --> 00:05:16,265 Worshipers: Yeah!
- 00:05:16,399 --> 00:05:18,168 All hail Deliria!
- 00:05:18,169 --> 00:05:19,873 Deliria: Thank you, thank you.
- 00:05:19,973 --> 00:05:21,275 It was hard. I'm amazing.
- 00:05:21,408 --> 00:05:23,146 Thank you. Hippocampus: Mom, I'm impressed.
- 00:05:23,246 --> 00:05:24,683 Bird nerds are highly intelligent
- 00:05:24,783 --> 00:05:27,021 and socially inept, which makes them
- 00:05:27,154 --> 00:05:28,591 even smarter, in my opinion.
- 00:05:28,691 --> 00:05:30,227 Stupendous: All right, guys, move in.
- 00:05:30,360 --> 00:05:32,464 Be respectful of the losers if you can.
- 00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,702 Hippocampus: Huh. Big, buff soldiers.
- 00:05:34,803 --> 00:05:36,272 Nerdy bird people.
- 00:05:36,372 --> 00:05:38,309 I can't remember. Did Ty come out as pro-
- 00:05:38,410 --> 00:05:39,746 or anti-selective breeding experiment?
- 00:05:39,847 --> 00:05:41,750 Deliria: You remember things he says?
- 00:05:41,850 --> 00:05:43,955 Hippocampus: If we cross-bred their intelligence
- 00:05:44,055 --> 00:05:46,425 with their muscles, we'd create a super-citizen
- 00:05:46,426 --> 00:05:48,096 that could fight and think.
- 00:05:48,196 --> 00:05:49,867 And also love birds, I guess.
- 00:05:49,967 --> 00:05:51,871 Stupendous: Interesting. Soldiers with lovers
- 00:05:51,971 --> 00:05:55,009 in the city are soldiers who don't desert the city.
- 00:05:55,010 --> 00:05:57,715 Deliria: And if I had worshipers who were smart and beefy,
- 00:05:57,815 --> 00:06:00,622 guess whose hair I'd be in? Stupendous: Athena's?
- 00:06:00,755 --> 00:06:02,324 Deliria: I told you to never say it!
- 00:06:02,457 --> 00:06:04,328 Angry bird exit! [Crowd gasps]
- 00:06:04,461 --> 00:06:07,000 [Bird shrieks] Man: Majestic.
- 00:06:07,100 --> 00:06:09,171 Tyrannis: Good citizens. I think I have something
- 00:06:09,305 --> 00:06:11,042 that will make dry season go a lot faster.
- 00:06:11,175 --> 00:06:13,680 What I'm wearing is called a mud suit. Very cooling.
- 00:06:13,681 --> 00:06:15,383 Joshua: You think we haven't tried that?
- 00:06:15,484 --> 00:06:17,488 It dries, and then you're just dirty.
- 00:06:17,622 --> 00:06:20,060 Brutus: Come on, King Ty! We want action!
- 00:06:20,227 --> 00:06:22,431 [Citizens murmur angrily]
- 00:06:22,532 --> 00:06:26,205 Tyrannis: Who wants a pool?
- 00:06:26,305 --> 00:06:27,808 [Thunder]
- 00:06:27,942 --> 00:06:30,312 [Citizens cheering]
- 00:06:30,313 --> 00:06:32,818 Scott: Cannonball! Citizens: Ooh!
- 00:06:33,654 --> 00:06:36,492 Scott: My leg's a little broken, I think.
- 00:06:38,698 --> 00:06:39,999 Tyrannis: I'll be damned.
- 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:41,736 The old Mantitaur was right.
- 00:06:41,737 --> 00:06:43,639 The whole city is in the pool.
- 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:45,176 Even Baby Charybdis is here.
- 00:06:45,276 --> 00:06:47,180 Baby Charybdis: Hey, Ty! Great pool!
- 00:06:47,280 --> 00:06:49,151 Brutus: Hell yeah! I love this pool!
- 00:06:49,251 --> 00:06:50,588 [Ball pops] Baby Charybdis: Aw!
- 00:06:50,688 --> 00:06:52,592 Scott: Hail Tyrannis! Hero of dry season!
- 00:06:52,692 --> 00:06:54,630 [Citizens cheer] Tyrannis: Oh, you guys.
- 00:06:54,730 --> 00:06:56,399 I just want everyone to have fun.
- 00:06:56,534 --> 00:06:58,402 Ah, Dad! Shlub: I see you're having fun
- 00:06:58,503 --> 00:07:00,407 with the weather stick. Glad you've come around.
- 00:07:00,508 --> 00:07:02,746 Just remember: a little does go a long way.
- 00:07:02,846 --> 00:07:05,050 Tyrannis: Right, yeah, sure. Shlub: I do say this
- 00:07:05,183 --> 00:07:06,786 as an expert in indulgence.
- 00:07:06,953 --> 00:07:08,757 Tyrannis: Indulgence, yes! What's this now?
- 00:07:08,890 --> 00:07:11,296 Farmer: Uh, your grace? Fantastic job with the pool.
- 00:07:11,429 --> 00:07:13,065 Tyrannis: No need to thank me for the pool.
- 00:07:13,165 --> 00:07:15,738 Seeing my citizens refreshed and grateful is enough.
- 00:07:15,838 --> 00:07:18,811 Farmer: One little thing. My cows are dying of thirst.
- 00:07:18,911 --> 00:07:21,115 They're like my family. Who I milk.
- 00:07:21,216 --> 00:07:23,688 Tyrannis: Oh, right. Well, I wouldn't be "the people's king"
- 00:07:23,821 --> 00:07:25,992 if I didn't help out your cow fam.
- 00:07:26,092 --> 00:07:27,394 What do you say
- 00:07:27,529 --> 00:07:30,200 to a world-class irrigation system?
- 00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:32,371 Farmer: I can't thank you enough!
- 00:07:32,505 --> 00:07:34,341 Please, take one of my cow daughters.
- 00:07:34,475 --> 00:07:36,379 Do whatever with it! Tyrannis: Oh, that's OK.
- 00:07:36,479 --> 00:07:38,584 Farmer: Go on. Tyrannis: I'm not having sex
- 00:07:38,684 --> 00:07:40,020 with a cow! Farmer: Huh?
- 00:07:40,153 --> 00:07:42,290 Tyrannis: What? Oh! Farmer: Is that what you thought
- 00:07:42,391 --> 00:07:43,761 I was offering? Tyrannis: No, no, no,
- 00:07:43,861 --> 00:07:45,598 of course not. Sex, with a cow? Who would--
- 00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:48,571 No, I was just mentioning, uh, that--in fact,
- 00:07:48,671 --> 00:07:50,808 you know what? I will take one of those cows.
- 00:07:50,941 --> 00:07:53,312 Farmer: I don't think so. Tyrannis: Right. Fair enough.
- 00:07:53,413 --> 00:07:55,785 Stupendous: OK, company! Time for mess!
- 00:07:55,885 --> 00:07:57,955 Hippocampus: Seating arrangements are mandatory!
- 00:07:58,055 --> 00:07:59,760 I don't expect them to mate right away.
- 00:07:59,860 --> 00:08:02,230 As a male scientist, I estimate 10 to 15 minutes
- 00:08:02,330 --> 00:08:05,203 of light conversation before intercourse. Let's observe.
- 00:08:05,304 --> 00:08:07,942 Soldier 2: So you just believe everything you see on urns?
- 00:08:08,042 --> 00:08:09,979 Worshiper 2: You think what, the whole thing was faked?
- 00:08:10,079 --> 00:08:11,950 She didn't kill her kids? Soldier 2: You're the one
- 00:08:12,050 --> 00:08:14,589 listening to mainstream Medea! Hippocampus: Yikes.
- 00:08:14,689 --> 00:08:16,792 Let's try another table. Soldier 3: I saw my best friend
- 00:08:16,793 --> 00:08:18,563 slaughtered at the Battle of Thebes.
- 00:08:18,663 --> 00:08:20,902 He was standing as close to me as you are right now.
- 00:08:21,002 --> 00:08:23,406 We were only boys. Worshiper 1: Uhh...
- 00:08:23,507 --> 00:08:25,945 are you gonna ask me anything about me?
- 00:08:26,078 --> 00:08:28,216 Hippocampus: Maybe this is gonna be harder than we thought.
- 00:08:28,349 --> 00:08:30,386 Tyrannis: Ahem! Ahem! Please note
- 00:08:30,487 --> 00:08:32,023 that persons having active leprosy,
- 00:08:32,123 --> 00:08:34,729 or who have had leprosy within the previous 14 days,
- 00:08:34,896 --> 00:08:36,867 shall not be allowed to enter the pool.
- 00:08:36,967 --> 00:08:39,472 Leper: Aw! Woman: My beloved king?
- 00:08:39,573 --> 00:08:41,242 We heard you're giving away water
- 00:08:41,342 --> 00:08:42,745 and, well, we'd love some
- 00:08:42,845 --> 00:08:45,784 for Krapopolis' orphanage. To bathe them and such.
- 00:08:45,918 --> 00:08:48,154 Tyrannis: You had me at "my beloved king!"
- 00:08:48,155 --> 00:08:49,692 [Thunder]
- 00:08:49,792 --> 00:08:52,031 Shine up those motherless boys and girls!
- 00:08:52,131 --> 00:08:54,267 Woman: Oh, we use the girls for kindling,
- 00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:56,372 to heat the boys' baths. Thanks!
- 00:08:56,507 --> 00:08:57,876 Long live King Ty!
- 00:08:58,009 --> 00:09:00,615 Man: King Ty? If you don't mind. Tyrannis: Thank you.
- 00:09:00,715 --> 00:09:02,985 I was starting to think about what that woman just said.
- 00:09:03,119 --> 00:09:06,559 She wasn't saying that they burn the girls
- 00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:08,797 for kindling, was she?
- 00:09:08,897 --> 00:09:10,802 Man: I've heard you're giving out water.
- 00:09:10,902 --> 00:09:12,572 Tyrannis: Yes, thank you! Thank you again.
- 00:09:12,672 --> 00:09:14,843 Ooh, please, go ahead. Man: I've kinda been debating
- 00:09:14,977 --> 00:09:16,780 adding a little pond to my property,
- 00:09:16,946 --> 00:09:18,917 maybe putting some fish in it? Tyrannis: Say no more.
- 00:09:19,018 --> 00:09:21,355 Will this do? [Weather stick whooshes]
- 00:09:21,455 --> 00:09:23,025 [Thunder]
- 00:09:23,125 --> 00:09:25,764 Man: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! [Chuckling] I mean, yeah,
- 00:09:25,864 --> 00:09:27,836 but I want to reiterate that I'm still
- 00:09:27,936 --> 00:09:29,938 in the "waffling" phase here.
- 00:09:29,939 --> 00:09:32,912 I guess, if I decide against the fish pond,
- 00:09:33,045 --> 00:09:34,916 I'll just dump this water into a gulch.
- 00:09:35,016 --> 00:09:36,653 Tyrannis: Long as you're happy! Who's next?
- 00:09:36,753 --> 00:09:38,691 [Horse nickers] Well, hello, How can I help?
- 00:09:38,791 --> 00:09:40,561 Woman: Well, I have this cactus.
- 00:09:40,661 --> 00:09:42,197 The soil feels pretty moist, but--
- 00:09:42,297 --> 00:09:44,936 Tyrannis: Better safe than succulent-less!
- 00:09:45,036 --> 00:09:46,873 [Weather stick sputters] Oh. Hmm.
- 00:09:46,973 --> 00:09:50,647 That's weird. Let me just...
- 00:09:51,984 --> 00:09:54,321 [Citizens cheer] Woman: I'm not normally
- 00:09:54,421 --> 00:09:56,693 into someone with your leg shape, but would you
- 00:09:56,793 --> 00:09:59,196 ever want to "hang out"? Tyrannis: Absolutely.
- 00:09:59,197 --> 00:10:01,335 Maybe you'd like to see the city's famous fountain show.
- 00:10:01,435 --> 00:10:04,742 Woman: You have a fountain show? Tyrannis: We're about to!
- 00:10:04,843 --> 00:10:07,414 Hippocampus: Nothing like a little game to get things going.
- 00:10:07,515 --> 00:10:09,485 Worshiper 1: OK, this is a tough one.
- 00:10:09,586 --> 00:10:11,422 What... uh... I--hmm.
- 00:10:11,557 --> 00:10:13,025 I don't know. [Bell rings]
- 00:10:13,125 --> 00:10:15,898 Soldier 3: Odobenus the Great? How did we not get that?
- 00:10:15,998 --> 00:10:17,769 Worshiper 1: Am I supposed to know who that is?
- 00:10:17,869 --> 00:10:19,740 Soldier 3: He's the jolly walrus-man hybrid
- 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:21,776 who forges our armor! You could have given
- 00:10:21,777 --> 00:10:24,515 so many clue words! Walrus! Man! Forge!
- 00:10:24,516 --> 00:10:27,688 Knowing smile! Likes to rape! Hippocampus: I don't get it.
- 00:10:27,689 --> 00:10:29,424 This icebreaker always works with mice.
- 00:10:29,525 --> 00:10:31,429 Stupendous: I don't think smart people and people who can
- 00:10:31,530 --> 00:10:33,834 do a one-handed pull-up are meant to talk to each other.
- 00:10:33,934 --> 00:10:36,406 Deliria: How are my super-soldiers coming along?
- 00:10:36,507 --> 00:10:37,842 Hippocampus: Not great yet.
- 00:10:38,009 --> 00:10:39,813 Deliria: What an incredible surprise.
- 00:10:39,946 --> 00:10:42,017 Who would have guessed, when the soldiers can see all
- 00:10:42,117 --> 00:10:44,021 the worshipers' veins, and the worshipers can smell
- 00:10:44,155 --> 00:10:46,793 all the soldiers'... well, all the soldiers.
- 00:10:46,893 --> 00:10:48,931 Here. [Lightning sparks]
- 00:10:49,031 --> 00:10:50,534 [Crowd gasps] Hippocampus: Hey!
- 00:10:50,635 --> 00:10:54,074 We're trying to create lasting emotional connections here!
- 00:10:54,174 --> 00:10:56,245 Worshiper 3: Hi, I'm Katie. My friends are annoying.
- 00:10:56,378 --> 00:10:58,482 Can I hang with you? Stupendous: Stand down, Hippo.
- 00:10:58,650 --> 00:11:00,019 Hippocampus: But--come on! I was just--
- 00:11:00,152 --> 00:11:01,923 Worshiper 4: Hey, do you want to hear me talk about
- 00:11:02,023 --> 00:11:04,829 the Sardinian warbler for a really long time?
- 00:11:04,929 --> 00:11:06,767 Hippocampus: Do I! Worshiper 4: So, starting
- 00:11:06,867 --> 00:11:08,737 with the plumage...
- 00:11:08,837 --> 00:11:11,208 [Dance music playing]
- 00:11:12,745 --> 00:11:14,649 Shlub: Isn't instant gratification
- 00:11:14,749 --> 00:11:16,686 just so incredibly gratifying?
- 00:11:16,786 --> 00:11:18,757 Tyrannis: I don't know why it took me so long.
- 00:11:18,857 --> 00:11:20,594 Joshua: Hey, Ty-bone! Great pool.
- 00:11:20,694 --> 00:11:22,264 Tyrannis: People are giving me nicknames!
- 00:11:22,397 --> 00:11:23,600 Joshua: You mean new nicknames.
- 00:11:23,700 --> 00:11:25,069 Tyrannis: What was my previous nickname?
- 00:11:25,169 --> 00:11:26,807 Joshua: Ha ha! We don't have to get into that.
- 00:11:26,907 --> 00:11:28,510 Tyrannis: See, before, they felt they couldn't get
- 00:11:28,644 --> 00:11:30,179 too close to me. They were too concerned
- 00:11:30,279 --> 00:11:32,851 about the decorum between a king and his subjects.
- 00:11:32,951 --> 00:11:34,287 Shlub: Let's say that's it, yes.
- 00:11:34,387 --> 00:11:36,392 Tyrannis: But now, look at this. Miriam, up top.
- 00:11:36,492 --> 00:11:38,195 Miriam: Looking good, Not-Dork.
- 00:11:38,295 --> 00:11:39,898 Hey, can you wet down my sandals?
- 00:11:39,899 --> 00:11:42,505 They just look better with a little sheen.
- 00:11:42,605 --> 00:11:44,175 Tyrannis: Sure thing.
- 00:11:44,308 --> 00:11:46,212 Shlub: Son, might you be overdoing it a little?
- 00:11:46,312 --> 00:11:48,115 Tyrannis: Whaaat? Now who's the uptight one?
- 00:11:48,249 --> 00:11:50,787 Grab yourself a Ty Colada and start your next nap right there.
- 00:11:50,921 --> 00:11:52,792 Joshua: Hey, you guys want to see my pee stream?
- 00:11:52,892 --> 00:11:55,396 Tyrannis: Oh, Joshua, we really don't need to see that--
- 00:11:55,496 --> 00:11:57,267 That is quite robust.
- 00:11:57,367 --> 00:12:00,173 [Loud dance music playing] Stupendous: OK, this is crazy.
- 00:12:00,273 --> 00:12:02,712 Some of the soldiers who deserted heard about this
- 00:12:02,812 --> 00:12:04,481 and came back, with more soldiers!
- 00:12:04,582 --> 00:12:06,886 And everyone's humping! Hippocampus: Something about
- 00:12:06,986 --> 00:12:09,324 the music and the darkness and the alcohol.
- 00:12:09,325 --> 00:12:11,127 We've created an atmosphere
- 00:12:11,128 --> 00:12:13,266 of artificial sexual arousal!
- 00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:16,272 Stupendous: No one can hear anything anyone is saying!
- 00:12:16,405 --> 00:12:18,710 And they're loving it!
- 00:12:18,810 --> 00:12:21,081 Hippocampus: I'm gonna live forever!
- 00:12:21,215 --> 00:12:24,821 It's a feeling I'm having right now due to the intensity
- 00:12:24,822 --> 00:12:27,393 of the atmosphere! Deliria: What?
- 00:12:27,493 --> 00:12:29,030 Tyrannis: Oh, hey, Kolax, there's probably gonna be
- 00:12:29,130 --> 00:12:31,035 a lot of citizens who want to talk to me today.
- 00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:33,072 Kolax: Oh, no doubt, boss. I'll keep 'em away.
- 00:12:33,205 --> 00:12:35,476 No one gets close. That's the rule, right?
- 00:12:35,611 --> 00:12:36,913 Tyrannis: No, no, that's the thing.
- 00:12:37,013 --> 00:12:38,416 Ordinarily I would need protection,
- 00:12:38,517 --> 00:12:40,152 but I want to mingle with the citizens now.
- 00:12:40,253 --> 00:12:41,824 Kolax: I can't let you. It's too risky.
- 00:12:41,924 --> 00:12:43,727 Tyrannis: We're living in a new era, Kolax.
- 00:12:43,827 --> 00:12:45,798 One where people like their king.
- 00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:47,534 I'm parched. Anyone want water?
- 00:12:47,668 --> 00:12:51,108 Yesterday I got this thing to do both flat and bubbly.
- 00:12:51,208 --> 00:12:52,444 Ahem.
- 00:12:52,578 --> 00:12:54,982 Damn. What is wrong with this thing?
- 00:12:55,082 --> 00:12:56,418 Shlub: I've never seen it do that before.
- 00:12:56,552 --> 00:12:58,757 You may have overused it. Tyrannis: Overused it?
- 00:12:58,890 --> 00:13:00,159 You can't overuse it.
- 00:13:00,259 --> 00:13:02,163 Can you overuse it? Shlub: I don't know.
- 00:13:02,263 --> 00:13:03,901 Tyrannis: Well, how do you fix it?
- 00:13:04,001 --> 00:13:05,604 Shlub: I don't know that, either.
- 00:13:05,704 --> 00:13:07,073 I've never been in this situation before.
- 00:13:07,173 --> 00:13:08,810 Tyrannis: Well, we've got to get it working.
- 00:13:08,811 --> 00:13:10,313 I'm in a really good place right now.
- 00:13:10,447 --> 00:13:11,950 I've got citizens loving me, cows winking at me.
- 00:13:12,050 --> 00:13:13,419 I need to keep this going. Scott: King,
- 00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:15,791 we've got a problem. The Placeans are here.
- 00:13:15,891 --> 00:13:17,226 Tyrannis: Oh, your friends who gave us the stick.
- 00:13:17,327 --> 00:13:18,763 Maybe they can fix it. Scott: Yeah, no.
- 00:13:18,897 --> 00:13:20,332 They're attacking. Tyrannis: Attacking?
- 00:13:20,432 --> 00:13:24,473 Chief Ravdi: I am Chief Ravdi, of the Placean people!
- 00:13:24,474 --> 00:13:25,844 Shlub: Ravdi, old friend!
- 00:13:25,978 --> 00:13:27,815 Chief Ravdi: Don't "old friend" me, Shlub!
- 00:13:27,948 --> 00:13:30,854 You stole our weather stick! Tyrannis: You stole it?!
- 00:13:30,954 --> 00:13:33,025 Chief Ravdi: Open your gates or your whole city
- 00:13:33,125 --> 00:13:35,430 will pay the price! Scott: Should we open the gates?
- 00:13:35,598 --> 00:13:37,267 Tyrannis: It doesn't really seem like that's the best course
- 00:13:37,367 --> 00:13:39,036 of action, Scott, now, does it?! Scott: I don't know!
- 00:13:39,037 --> 00:13:40,641 I just work here! Tyrannis: Dad, fill me in.
- 00:13:40,741 --> 00:13:43,045 What have you not told me? Shlub: Ravdi's a good fellow.
- 00:13:43,145 --> 00:13:45,884 This has to be a simple misunderstanding.
- 00:13:45,885 --> 00:13:48,055 Chief Ravdi: Fire!
- 00:13:49,290 --> 00:13:52,965 Shlub: Maybe a misunderstanding on my part. Ha ha!
- 00:13:55,270 --> 00:13:56,137 Ty: There's no need for violence!
- 00:13:56,138 --> 00:13:58,307 I'm sure this is all just a silly mix-up.
- 00:13:58,308 --> 00:14:00,213 Can we say that? Can we pretend that's what it is?
- 00:14:00,313 --> 00:14:02,919 Chief Ravdi: The silly mix-up was me allowing this thief
- 00:14:03,052 --> 00:14:05,357 to participate in our Friendship Festival!
- 00:14:05,457 --> 00:14:08,295 Did those trust falls mean nothing to you?
- 00:14:08,296 --> 00:14:09,999 Tyrannis: Dad, you told me you got the weather stick
- 00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:11,535 from your friends. Shlub: They are my friends,
- 00:14:11,536 --> 00:14:13,238 and I did get it. Tyrannis: But he's saying
- 00:14:13,239 --> 00:14:15,443 you stole it! Shlub: Stealing is a--hmm,
- 00:14:15,610 --> 00:14:17,882 it's a kind of getting, but I didn't steal anything.
- 00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:20,353 I simply abided by the rules of finders keepers.
- 00:14:20,486 --> 00:14:22,223 Tyrannis: Finders keepers? Shlub: Yes, if you find
- 00:14:22,323 --> 00:14:24,963 something--here's the best bit-- you get to keep it.
- 00:14:25,063 --> 00:14:26,967 I guess when I said they gave it to me, I meant
- 00:14:27,067 --> 00:14:29,071 they gave it to me in a holistic sense,
- 00:14:29,171 --> 00:14:31,175 by leaving it somewhere where I could find it.
- 00:14:31,341 --> 00:14:33,613 Tyrannis: Mm! Look, my dad is a silly old man,
- 00:14:33,714 --> 00:14:35,617 and I promise we can make this right.
- 00:14:35,718 --> 00:14:37,387 Chief Ravdi: Lightning! Tyrannis: Ow!
- 00:14:37,487 --> 00:14:38,890 You have other sticks?
- 00:14:38,990 --> 00:14:40,460 Chief Ravdi: You better believe we have other sticks!
- 00:14:40,561 --> 00:14:42,430 Shlub: They're a stick-based culture, which is why
- 00:14:42,531 --> 00:14:45,103 they shouldn't mind losing one. Chief Ravdi: Biting flies!
- 00:14:45,203 --> 00:14:47,073 [Flies buzzing] Shlub: Ow! Ow! Damn you!
- 00:14:47,173 --> 00:14:48,544 Tyrannis: Please, I see that we made a mistake,
- 00:14:48,644 --> 00:14:50,781 and I'd love to make this right. Why don't you stay
- 00:14:50,914 --> 00:14:53,018 and enjoy our many waterfalls and lazy rivers?
- 00:14:53,118 --> 00:14:54,454 Chief Ravdi: You don't get it!
- 00:14:54,555 --> 00:14:56,225 Tyrannis: Or perhaps you'd like to experience
- 00:14:56,325 --> 00:14:57,895 our world-famous slip-then-slide?
- 00:14:57,996 --> 00:14:59,364 It turns accidents into fun-ccidents.
- 00:14:59,498 --> 00:15:01,100 If we just get this thing working again,
- 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,540 I promise there's enough water for everyone.
- 00:15:03,706 --> 00:15:05,042 Chief Ravdi: Only there isn't!
- 00:15:05,143 --> 00:15:06,746 The weather stick doesn't make water.
- 00:15:06,846 --> 00:15:08,783 It simply moves it from place to place.
- 00:15:08,883 --> 00:15:11,556 So not only did you steal our stick,
- 00:15:11,656 --> 00:15:13,292 you stole our lifeblood.
- 00:15:13,392 --> 00:15:16,499 Our livestock. Our live... crops.
- 00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:20,005 Our vegetables! Everything!
- 00:15:20,841 --> 00:15:22,177 Shlub: Hello.
- 00:15:22,277 --> 00:15:24,214 Ty: Did you know about this? Shlub: Who's to say?
- 00:15:24,314 --> 00:15:26,151 I've heard a lot of things over the years.
- 00:15:26,251 --> 00:15:29,158 They don't always stay with me. Besides, I just gave you access
- 00:15:29,291 --> 00:15:31,162 to the stick, I didn't tell you to drain the world!
- 00:15:31,295 --> 00:15:34,400 Chief Ravdi: Dust in your eyes! Shlub: Ow! Stop it!
- 00:15:34,502 --> 00:15:36,304 Tyrannis: Chief Ravdi, we needed water.
- 00:15:36,404 --> 00:15:38,476 My father saw that I was in need, and while he should not
- 00:15:38,610 --> 00:15:40,747 have taken your weather stick in the first place,
- 00:15:40,881 --> 00:15:42,752 surely you see that he was simply trying
- 00:15:42,885 --> 00:15:44,755 to help out his son in an emergency.
- 00:15:44,889 --> 00:15:46,458 Chief Ravdi: It was no emergency!
- 00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:48,362 You're running a sexy chariot wash!
- 00:15:48,496 --> 00:15:50,232 [Chariot washers cheer] Tyrannis: OK,
- 00:15:50,332 --> 00:15:52,237 it did get a little out of hand. Chief Ravdi: Sunburn!
- 00:15:52,370 --> 00:15:54,107 Tyrannis: Ow! If using the water stick meant we were
- 00:15:54,207 --> 00:15:56,145 taking water from someplace else, aren't you giving me
- 00:15:56,278 --> 00:15:58,115 somebody else's sunburn? Chief Ravdi: Somehow,
- 00:15:58,249 --> 00:16:00,319 I don't think they're going to complain! Sleet!
- 00:16:00,453 --> 00:16:02,858 Tyrannis: Ah! How many sticks do you guys have?
- 00:16:02,958 --> 00:16:04,662 Chief Ravdi: Lots! Tyrannis: What do I have
- 00:16:04,762 --> 00:16:06,098 to do to make it right?
- 00:16:06,198 --> 00:16:07,568 Chief Ravdi: Give us the water back.
- 00:16:07,702 --> 00:16:09,437 Tyrannis: All of it? Chief Ravdi: Yes, all of it!
- 00:16:09,538 --> 00:16:11,743 Tyrannis: OK, just let me think. Ahem. Dad, you know these guys.
- 00:16:11,843 --> 00:16:13,244 What kind of damage can they do?
- 00:16:13,245 --> 00:16:14,949 Just kind of this relatively topical stuff?
- 00:16:15,049 --> 00:16:16,418 Shlub: I don't know. I'm not a stick man.
- 00:16:16,552 --> 00:16:18,188 I'm more of a finders-keepers man.
- 00:16:18,189 --> 00:16:19,792 Tyrannis: Of course you don't know.
- 00:16:19,892 --> 00:16:22,497 It seems like the worst they can do right now is biting flies.
- 00:16:22,632 --> 00:16:25,538 I'll just take my chances. [Chief Ravdi whistles]
- 00:16:25,638 --> 00:16:27,005 [Horses whinny]
- 00:16:27,006 --> 00:16:29,177 Shlub: Ravdi, you old bastard,
- 00:16:29,277 --> 00:16:32,183 you've built a bigger stick, haven't you?
- 00:16:32,283 --> 00:16:34,187 Tyrannis: This is probably a stupid question,
- 00:16:34,287 --> 00:16:36,224 but where the hell are Mom and the army?!
- 00:16:36,358 --> 00:16:38,563 Stupendous: It's still so hot. And there's no moisture
- 00:16:38,663 --> 00:16:41,435 left in my body. Gimme some of your helmet water.
- 00:16:41,536 --> 00:16:43,338 Hippocampus: Get off! I'm already flaking!
- 00:16:43,472 --> 00:16:45,511 Soldier 4: That was great. Soldier 2: Yeah, last night,
- 00:16:45,611 --> 00:16:48,315 I drank wine till I was disoriented and unable
- 00:16:48,416 --> 00:16:50,554 to perform sexually. I feel ill today.
- 00:16:50,654 --> 00:16:52,592 Let's do it again tonight! Hippocampus: Weren't you one
- 00:16:52,692 --> 00:16:54,895 of the deserters trying to leave Krapopolis?
- 00:16:55,029 --> 00:16:56,464 Soldier 4: Yeah. Changed my mind, I guess.
- 00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:59,238 Turns out if I drink enough and dance around at night,
- 00:16:59,338 --> 00:17:02,175 I forget my life during the day is miserable.
- 00:17:02,176 --> 00:17:04,481 Hippocampus: So people will stay in the most disgusting,
- 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:07,220 awful city if it has some kind of "night life."
- 00:17:07,353 --> 00:17:09,224 We need a name for this principle.
- 00:17:09,358 --> 00:17:11,228 Oh! What'd you say your name was?
- 00:17:11,362 --> 00:17:13,065 Soldier 4: Miami. Hippocampus: Ehh...
- 00:17:13,165 --> 00:17:14,836 Stupendous: Technically I should beat these deserters.
- 00:17:14,936 --> 00:17:18,042 But maybe letting them have fun is better than clubbing them?
- 00:17:18,142 --> 00:17:20,514 Hippocampus: That's what we call it: "deserting"!
- 00:17:20,614 --> 00:17:23,485 No! "Clubbing." Stupendous: Hey, Mom. You're up.
- 00:17:23,586 --> 00:17:25,624 Anybody pregnant in there? Deliria: I don't think so.
- 00:17:25,724 --> 00:17:28,630 Most of your troops had too much wine to raise the flag,
- 00:17:28,763 --> 00:17:31,367 if you know what I mean. Stupendous: Ohh, right.
- 00:17:31,368 --> 00:17:34,339 I think I know what you mean. Well, it didn't help that
- 00:17:34,340 --> 00:17:37,380 your worshipers spent half the night in the bathroom crying.
- 00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:39,384 Deliria: Katie was going through some stuff.
- 00:17:39,519 --> 00:17:41,154 You know, I think we should do this again.
- 00:17:41,255 --> 00:17:42,992 Or at least, roughly every seven days.
- 00:17:43,092 --> 00:17:45,430 We can call it "Septimal Night Veneration."
- 00:17:45,531 --> 00:17:47,167 Hippocampus: We're already calling it "clubbing."
- 00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:48,937 Deliria: Well, we'll see what catches on first.
- 00:17:49,037 --> 00:17:51,174 Tyrannis: So that's probably some sort of doomsday stick,
- 00:17:51,275 --> 00:17:53,145 right? Shlub: I had no idea they have
- 00:17:53,245 --> 00:17:54,682 this kind of power. Tyrannis: I should have known
- 00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:56,552 there would be crazy consequences if I used
- 00:17:56,686 --> 00:17:58,590 something from your magic box. Shlub: Yes, you should have,
- 00:17:58,690 --> 00:18:00,728 and I did warn you. Tyrannis: We have two options.
- 00:18:00,828 --> 00:18:03,332 Option one is we all die. Option two is I give them back
- 00:18:03,432 --> 00:18:05,302 their water, and people don't like me.
- 00:18:05,436 --> 00:18:07,007 Shlub: I think it should be fairly obvious, son.
- 00:18:07,140 --> 00:18:08,677 Tyrannis: Yeah, easy for you to say.
- 00:18:08,777 --> 00:18:10,613 People have always liked you. But now the Placeans are going
- 00:18:10,714 --> 00:18:13,218 to do whatever that stick does, and the tickle trolls aren't
- 00:18:13,318 --> 00:18:15,256 even here, so I'm starting to think they were just
- 00:18:15,356 --> 00:18:17,260 something you and Mom made up to mess with me!
- 00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:18,930 Shlub: Well, that's on you for being thirty
- 00:18:19,064 --> 00:18:20,801 and still believing in tickle trolls.
- 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:23,773 But I believe I owe you an apology.
- 00:18:24,776 --> 00:18:26,278 Tyrannis: Any more to that?
- 00:18:26,378 --> 00:18:28,015 Shlub: Oh, I haven't done this in a while.
- 00:18:28,115 --> 00:18:30,887 I thought that would be enough. What's called for, specifics?
- 00:18:30,988 --> 00:18:32,958 Tyrannis: You're actually asking? Yes!
- 00:18:33,058 --> 00:18:34,528 Shlub: All right, all right. Um...
- 00:18:34,628 --> 00:18:37,568 I just hated seeing you being unhappy and unliked, son.
- 00:18:37,668 --> 00:18:40,574 But as your dad, I should get used to that.
- 00:18:40,674 --> 00:18:43,345 No? More? Is that enough? Tyrannis: It'll do.
- 00:18:43,445 --> 00:18:45,651 And, as a leader, in the future, I should resist
- 00:18:45,751 --> 00:18:47,654 overpromising and immediate gratification.
- 00:18:47,754 --> 00:18:49,892 True leadership lies in under-promising,
- 00:18:49,992 --> 00:18:51,663 overdelivering, and slow progress.
- 00:18:51,763 --> 00:18:53,699 Shlub: Ha! It's a whole back and forth!
- 00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:55,102 We're both apologizing!
- 00:18:55,236 --> 00:18:57,207 What fun we're having! Ah, ha ha ha ha!
- 00:18:57,340 --> 00:19:00,213 Tyrannis: Yes. You know, we have done this before.
- 00:19:00,313 --> 00:19:03,251 Shlub: Well, son, even if this whole town turns on you--
- 00:19:03,252 --> 00:19:05,223 and they will-- I'll still love you.
- 00:19:05,323 --> 00:19:07,225 Tyrannis: Thanks, Dad. I guess no matter what,
- 00:19:07,226 --> 00:19:08,997 they will never be satisfied, and that's something
- 00:19:09,097 --> 00:19:10,466 I have to be OK with as king.
- 00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:12,772 I think I know what I have to do.
- 00:19:12,905 --> 00:19:15,243 Everybody out of the pool. Swim time is over.
- 00:19:15,343 --> 00:19:16,879 Citizens: Boo!
- 00:19:17,013 --> 00:19:19,685 Joshua: I'm not getting out till my toes are all wrinkly!
- 00:19:19,785 --> 00:19:21,656 Tyrannis: This water you're all enjoying,
- 00:19:21,756 --> 00:19:23,425 and that's making you all love me, was stolen.
- 00:19:23,526 --> 00:19:25,096 So I'm afraid it must be returned.
- 00:19:25,229 --> 00:19:27,166 Citizens: Boo! Tyrannis: Yes,
- 00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:29,537 you can hate me if you want. Brutus: We do!
- 00:19:29,538 --> 00:19:32,544 Tyrannis: And I accept that.
- 00:19:32,645 --> 00:19:35,550 Or I will someday.
- 00:19:42,664 --> 00:19:44,100 Man: Oof. Oww!
- 00:19:44,234 --> 00:19:45,771 Citizens: Huh?
- 00:19:45,871 --> 00:19:47,575 Woman: Oh!
- 00:19:47,675 --> 00:19:49,645 Man 2: Oh--oof!
- 00:19:51,749 --> 00:19:53,653 Tyrannis: There you go. Chief Ravdi: And the stick?
- 00:19:53,753 --> 00:19:56,224 Tyrannis: What? I can't sneak anything past you guys.
- 00:19:56,325 --> 00:19:58,195 Are we good now? Chief Ravdi: We're good.
- 00:19:58,295 --> 00:20:02,538 Now you know never to mess with the Placeans.
- 00:20:02,705 --> 00:20:04,241 Ha ha ha ha! Man!
- 00:20:04,374 --> 00:20:07,648 That huge decoy stick works every time.
- 00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:09,652 Tyrannis: Well, now that everyone hates me,
- 00:20:09,752 --> 00:20:12,356 I might as well drown my sorrows in an orgy.
- 00:20:12,456 --> 00:20:14,059 Shlub: No, no. I have something else
- 00:20:14,060 --> 00:20:16,498 in my magic box for you. It's a hug.
- 00:20:16,633 --> 00:20:18,134 Tyrannis: But what about the orgy lamp?
- 00:20:18,135 --> 00:20:21,407 Shlub: Haven't you learned anything? That's just for me.
- 00:20:24,314 --> 00:20:26,986 Tickle troll leader: Ah, another delicious meal
- 00:20:27,086 --> 00:20:28,355 under another perfect moon.
- 00:20:28,455 --> 00:20:31,562 A tickle troll giggle for this beautiful day!
- 00:20:31,662 --> 00:20:34,033 [Laughter]
- 00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:35,771 What's this? What's happening?
- 00:20:35,871 --> 00:20:38,040 Tickle troll shaman: I knew this day would come.
- 00:20:38,041 --> 00:20:39,745 [Frog croaks] It is prophesied.
- 00:20:39,845 --> 00:20:43,018 For millennia, we tickle trolls lived in harmony with humans.
- 00:20:43,118 --> 00:20:44,755 We visited them in their sleep,
- 00:20:44,855 --> 00:20:47,493 and they rewarded us with their delicious laughter.
- 00:20:47,594 --> 00:20:50,701 Heh! But then, parents started using us as a threat.
- 00:20:50,801 --> 00:20:52,704 "Beware the tickle trolls," they said.
- 00:20:52,804 --> 00:20:55,242 "Their name is a fake-out," they said.
- 00:20:55,342 --> 00:20:58,082 "Brush your teeth or the tickle trolls will get you!"
- 00:20:58,182 --> 00:21:01,087 "Don't wet your bed or the tickle trolls will get you."
- 00:21:01,221 --> 00:21:03,660 Heh! No longer did the children bless us with their laughter.
- 00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:06,264 They screamed at the sight of us!
- 00:21:06,364 --> 00:21:08,035 So we stopped tickling them.
- 00:21:08,135 --> 00:21:09,738 Generations of kids grew up
- 00:21:09,838 --> 00:21:11,207 never even seeing us!
- 00:21:11,208 --> 00:21:13,010 They believed they had been tricked.
- 00:21:13,011 --> 00:21:16,385 And just as foretold by our sacred oral tradition,
- 00:21:16,485 --> 00:21:19,123 when the last little boy stopped believing in us,
- 00:21:19,223 --> 00:21:21,563 we would disappear. [Frog croaks]
- 00:21:21,663 --> 00:21:23,567 Tickle troll leader: Wait. You knew this day
- 00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,736 would come, but you never told us?
- 00:21:25,737 --> 00:21:27,440 Tickle troll shaman: It never came up.
- 00:21:27,541 --> 00:21:30,781 Tickle troll: We have an oral tradition?
- 00:21:30,981 --> 00:21:32,684 Man: Did you get any of that?
- 00:21:34,722 --> 00:21:36,424 Woman: Bento. [People cheer]
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